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If you notice a person whom you haven't seen in a while has lost weight, should you mention it?

Difficult for me to tell if they would take it as a compliment or an insult. Sometimes people lose weight because of illness and don't want to be reminded. I've lost 20 pounds in the last year. I'd be pleased if someone noticed and complimented me, but nobody has mentioned that they noticed. That made me wonder about the propriety of asking.

10 Answers

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  • 1 month ago
    Favorite Answer

    The way to mention it without being overt and possibly insulting about it would be to say something like "Wow, you look great!!" and leave it at that.

  • 1 month ago

    It's always safe to say, 'Great to see you again! Wow, you're looking fantastic!"

    Even someone who's worked hard at losing weight and is pleased with her result doesn't necessarily want people saying "Wow, you've lost so much weight and you look great" because that can ONLY mean "You used to look totally gross".

  • 1 month ago

    If I notice any weigh tloss or weight gain on someone, I never mention their weight. NEVER.

    Howsoever, if I notice weight loss, I would say something like "you look great" without pinpointing weight.

  • susan
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    I usually would not, because my preference is the opposite of yours- I don't enjoy unsolicited conversation about my weight loss. So I'm treating others the way I'd like to be treated. 

    I did make an exception when a friend of mine had lost so much weight that I wondered if it might be illness. I approached her out of earshot of others and asked her, "This weight loss, is it because of good health or illness?" This person was someone I used to be very close to, which is why I felt it would be permissible to ask and uncaring to not ask.

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  • Foofa
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    People are probably hesitant to mention someone else's appearance these days for fear of coming off as harassing or creepy. 

  • 1 month ago

    Weight loss, a face lift, dental work -- best to not get too specific when someone has a make over. "You're certainly looking wonderful, better than ever" is a strong complement that avoids hinting at overweight, jowls, or bad teeth. 

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    I would say that the person looked good. 

  • Pearl
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    depends on why they lost weight

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    choko's right. (Usually is.)

    It's considered rude or invasive to mention someone's weight, even in a positive way. Saying someone looks good is still fully acceptable.

  • pearl
    Lv 4
    1 month ago

    Yes, I sure would................

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