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Anonymous asked in HealthMental Health · 1 month ago

My Nan and grandad got funny with me since I said I was changing my last name, haven’t spoke to me since ?

Either. Said they didn’t think it would change things for me, despite me saying it would and yes it would, their son abused me and my siblings, including my mother for years, they don’t know that but they do know some things, we had to put up with his drug use too, starting to think the whole family are bad people. Anyway what do I do?


I said what do I do with a question mark but you’re too stupid to read. I’m not lying either, get a life you dirty tramp. 

Update 2:

Did i fûcking say it would make me a different person? In a way it would actually and yes I know for a fûcking fact it will help.

9 Answers

  • 1 month ago
    Favorite Answer

    I think they might have an inkling that their son was not good, and that you are changing your name because of it. There's not really anything you can do. They should have a sympathetic attitude towards you, not revenge for their "precious" son. At the very least, they should feel sorry about what he has done.

  • 1 month ago

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  • garry
    Lv 6
    1 month ago

    isnt your grandparents name good enough for you ! thats why there upset .

  • D50
    Lv 6
    1 month ago

    As long as you stay involved with them, it doesn't matter what your name is. They will continue to believe your father was the greatest and you're just a complaining ingrate. If you want to be free of that ****, you must free yourself from them and leave. A different name will do nothing.

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  • PR
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    It is unfortunate they do not want to talk with you. Of course, they know something is going on, and you have a reason you are doing this.

    But, it is true that changing your name is not going to change things entirely. It will help you identify with something different, if your name continues to remind you of your past. 

    You will also need to get past any habits your family has instilled regarding behavior and ways of dealing with things. For example, if you find becoming angry with those who do not agree with you is helpful, you might need to redirect your anger and try doing positive things.

    Learn your own skills and develop them. Begin to ignore those who say things you do not like or seem hurtful. Begin to help others so you can become compassionate. Join a church and make more friends who may be helpful. See the good in life and in others. 

    Additionally, there is a group called "Celebrate Recovery" that helps those who have been abused or suffered other hurts and harms, who need support. Consider investigating this in order to move on and grow in yourself.

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    just change your name if you want to. if they actually love you they wont give a damn about something so small

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    You have 2 choices:

    1. Change your name

    2. Don't change your name

    You have to decide if your the feelings of your nan and granddad are more or less important than your own. 

  • 1 month ago

    "despite me saying it would and yes it would," If your crystal ball works so well, why are you asking us?  With all the money you must be making in the stock market and everything you do, you should be able to afford a competent psychologist.

    It's unlikely that changing your name will do anything.  It doesn't make you a different person. 

    Have you contacted them?  If you contacted them, and they are ignoring you.  That's a different situation, than you expecting them to reach out to you when you won't reach out to them.

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    What should you do?   Leave things alone and hope they will eventually come around.   It's not your responsibility to "educate" your grandparents on what their son was doing.

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