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Lisa asked in Society & CultureEtiquette · 1 month ago

Does this sound selfish of my POI?

Young person in my 20s. Had a former boss in his 40s. Charming, handsome, gave impression he was kind. I left there in late 2019 and my boss told me he was attracted to me, he would call soon and we would hook up. A lot happened in my 2020. Lost both parents and had some health concerns myself. The guy never kept in touch like promised. He did in the beginning first few months. But hear he is a lot of stress also, but in year and a half I know he could have made time to reach out. I send emails every few weeks. I didn't after my most recent loss end of 2020 because figured he didnt care. A friend of his told me he was upset I quit emailing. So I emailed him again recently. He told his good friend how he doesnt want to lose me in his life but he isnt ready for a relationship. So in other words, he wants me to email even though he never replies to show I haven't moved on, but never replies or reaches out because he only wants to when he has ready. He has told his friend he really cares about me but doesnt email to lead me on right now because I deserve a lot and he thinks if he pursued relationship now when he is stressed it wouldnt be enough and he would hurt me. Doesn't this seem selfish, that he has never supported me in my losses or emailed me, yet claims he really cares and doesnt want to lead me on when he isnt ready and doesnt want to lose me in his life?

4 Answers

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  • Pearl
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    it does sound selfish

  • 1 month ago

    He is a person that doesn't understand that relationships exist on a two way street.  Give him time to mature, he knows how to reach you when he clues in.

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    This sounds like a bad high school play.   Why are you relying on second-hand information from a "friend?"   Talk to the guy directly, instead of random strangers on the internet.

    The number of times you've asked this question in the last month is concerning.

  • ?
    Lv 6
    1 month ago

    And asking a question twice in ten minutes is considered spamming, which is contrary to the Community Guidelines.  Look at the frequency of questions and answers in the category you're interested in to see how quickly answers are coming at this time of day.  Give your question enough time to be answered before you think about reposting (usually at least 24 hours).

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