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Am I bisexual or just confusing attraction with admiration?

I've always liked to be certain abt everything & I've dealt with OCD in the past abt some things. Last April I got sexuality OCD & I thought I got rid of it, but no.

I'm 18 & female. I've liked boys since I was 11. In fact I didn't even know that there was a name for my attraction. I just crushed on guys. 

I'm attracted to guys physically, romantically, & emotionally. Even when I'm reading something written by a guy (without knowing what he looks like), I feel kinda drawn to him & it makes me want a boyfriend. I've always liked guys in a way I could never like girls. 

Many of my friends are pretty, but I've never felt attraction towards them. I just like being friends. I've been able to appreciate the beauty of a girl, but I'd rather be in a relationship with an average looking guy than the "hottest" girl in the world. My attraction for guys is more than sexual is the point.

Anyways, I've been writing a book since I enjoy creative writing. I've envisioned how my characters would look. I was on VSCO & there was a pretty girl in a bikini who vaguely reminded me of one of my characters. For a few seconds I wondered if I was attracted to her. I also just envied her body & at the most would want to be friends. But I couldn't see myself in a relationship. Has anyone experienced something similar? 

Nothing wrong with being bi! I just don't want to feel like I'm living a lie.

I've never crushed on a girl (just admired) but I've crushed on real & imaginary & celebrity guys. 

2 Answers

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  • 2 months ago

    So, you're a girl who likes guys. OK there. You can appreciate attractiveness in your girl friends. No problem there. You get unexpected crushes on girls, but nothing sexual. It happens. I don't see your problem. Carry on with your life, it sounds fine to me. And good luck with the writing. BTW, I sometimes choose real people for my background characters. Some aspects of their appearance and/or character are changed but that way I never lose sight of what/who they are or what they look/sound/act like.

  • 2 months ago

    you're just liberal

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