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Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFriends · 2 months ago

Is my boss toxic? Why is/isn’t he? What should I do?

I work for a small business. I caught my manager gossiping about me over the phone to someone, I don’t know who. He was saying that I have no experience or background in what I do, and that I have no idea what I’m doing. What he said was not true, I have 3 years experience (I’m young) and have a bachelors degree, and I’ve been there for about 4 months. So I have a good grasp on things and I’ve only received positive feedback so I don’t understand why he’s telling people the opposite. He’s done this more than once.

He also makes me deliver the bad news to clients even when it’s not my fault (so people get p*ssed at me every now and then). I don’t even know that I have to until I’m out on the spot and there’s nothing I can do about it. He’ll just say “the phones for you.” Or “someone would like to speak to you.” Or something along those lines of that and I just think it’s someone wanting to talk about an order. 

We used to get along and now all the sudden it’s like he’s turning on me and I don’t know why. I’ve always got my work done and never argued about anything.

Another weird thing I noticed is that he’ll sometimes buy food for everyone, so he’d offer everyone food except me. I never say anything because I don’t want to sound stingy. 

2 Answers

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  • 2 months ago
    Favorite Answer

    Time to get your resume updated for it seems he is indirectly trying to get you leave.

  • 2 months ago

    No, not the least bit toxic.  Grow up.  Your boss is taking advantage of his position as the boss. He also, apparently, doesn't think you're very good at your job.  That again, is simply his assessment of your job performance -- which he is entitled to do.

    If you don't feel appreciated or don't like your job, you are free to apply to other companies.  You can also speak privately with your boss about what you perceive to be issues. Tell him you overheard him and want to know, specifically, what you are or or not doing correctly and how to improve.  

    People aren't toxic.  Behavior is.  The behavior your posted about isn't toxic.  It just is a person who isn't a great manager.  Toxic behavior is when some manipulative, passive-aggressive, angry, controlling, etc. when they don't actually have authority.  Your boss does have authority. It is their job to delegate work and a critique performance.  

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