T asked in Family & RelationshipsFriends · 1 month ago

How do you stay friends with someone who doesn’t understand systematic racism or why Kapernick took a knee. ?

He believes since black people arent slaves anymore that everything is equal now. I love my friend but he doesn’t get the struggles of people of color, he flat out denies them. I’m not confrontational at all but I try to politely explain why POC feel the way they do. I know he’s not racist but he’s not making any effort to empathize. I feel like a traitor to my race because I am friends with him when he doesn’t get it. Am I a traitor? How can I have a close relationship with him when it hurts me that he doesn’t get it. 


I am not intolerant as I overlook a lot of the comments he makes about POC , slavery is over everyone is treated equal blah blah. I try to word my responses in a way to see both sides so I’m not being dismissive of the concerns of others. I just think certain people can’t or dont want to understand certain struggles that people have had. 

Update 2:

I try to understand where other people’s thoughts come from. I believe people are mostly good. I’ve been a better friend to him than anyone despite the insensitive comments because he’s a good person.

7 Answers

  • ?
    Lv 7
    1 month ago
    Favorite Answer

    He is a supporter of the former president. He will never change. Likely of low intelligence. It is best you create some distance between yourself and him. 

  • 1 month ago

    Honestly these type of people just aren't going to listen no matter how hard you try to educate them, they're going to be narrow minded and stuck in their own ignorance. You should leave this relationship if he/she is incapable of understanding how you feel. 

  • 1 month ago

    Supporting Trump does not mean he should be so insensitive to blacks. The black were treated very badly in history and it is not like after that the blacks became the rulers of the country. As a matter of fact after that every president has been white (not including Obama). Obama was from a foreign father not actually a black person who lived in USA during that time.

    So it is not like the unjust has been overshadowed by recent developments. It is a sensitive issue and even today black people face a lot of unjust.

  • T J
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    He will probably drop you as a friend, he see's it on way, you see it another. neither one of you are going to change about is. so just drop it,or lose a friend.

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    I’m white and even I’m aware of the ripple effect that slavery had. Some folks are just ignorant and don’t care. Most of the time this crap are the beliefs of older conservatives who victim blame and think everyone is treated equally. The same idiots who blame sexual assault victims, they will most likely live the rest of their lives ignorant. Let him find a friend who shares his same values maybe the idiots who stormed the US Capitol are out on bail or need a pen pal. 😂

  • 1 month ago

    So, you're closed minded and intolerant. You can't be friends with someone who doesn't share your opinions. Your friend can find better friends than you. 

  • 1 month ago

    How do you think he feels? Is he a traitor having a close relationship with you when you might be the one who doesn’t get it?

    You are segregating yourself with other people based on skin color...and having expectations of loyalty based on skin color...and you don’t see that as an issue?

    Systemic racism is far from an established fact. It is a very recent, very left wing concept that has a world of evidence against it.  And police targeting people based on race is absolutely, statistically proven as false.

    However, victim mentality and lack of personal responsibility is well established.

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