Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 1 month ago

Can you live with your parents and be treated like an adult or do you have to move out?

 Since the pandemic all of my friends have moved back in with their parents, they always have to ask permission to go places and the parents constantly check their phones.  They constantly use the phrase “my house, my rules”, does this result in my friends acting like teenagers or does this mean that your parents are just controlling?

Update:

I understand having to be home at a certain time  and telling the people you live with where you are going.  I just think it’s weird that they have to ask permission before leaving anywhere even if it is within their curfew.  

Update 2:

@Foofa yeah of course they are more vulnerable to COVID. But as an adult you should know how to wear a mask and keep your distance.

10 Answers

Relevance
  • 4 weeks ago

    You have to remember one important factor; we are in a pandemic. Parents are checking up on them because it's a tumultuous time and are trying to keep everyone safe. I will say living with your parents again is not an easy task. People tend to fall back into patterns. If your friends want to be treated like adults then they need to act like one. The first step is open communication, they need to speak to their parents about any issues they are facing. And step two recognizing this is their parent's home and respect needs to be given. Being an adult is not a free for all. If you are living at home then contribute in some way. I've never liked the phrase "my house, my rules", this isn't a dictatorship, and respect is something that should flow both ways.

  • ?
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Your parents are older than you. This makes them more vulnerable to COVID-19 than you. All these friends who've moved home because they lost their jobs lost their jobs because it's not safe to be out. Any time they or you go out you're bringing home the contagions of everyone you interacted with. This isn't necessarily being "controlling" so much as trying to balance keeping a roof over your unemployed adult child's head but at the same time not wanting his/her social life to kill you. 

  • ?
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    You have to move out. 

  • ?
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    depends on who your parents are

  • How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer.
  • D50
    Lv 6
    1 month ago

    Don't all these suffering losers have the right to move out?

  • 1 month ago

    The only way to avoid this is to move back home....PAY FOR EVERYTHING IN YOUR PARENTS HOUSE then you can tell them what to do.

    Parents shouldnt let kids move back home they need to work harder.

  • ?
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    My house, my rules, even when renting, there are rules depending on where one is. That's life.  Now, the checking of the phones is overkill but the curfews and such. They are about respect, it is how people living together should be. As far as checking phones and such, that is a crock, unless the parents are still paying for those phones.

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    I think you have an issue if ALL of your friends moved back in with their parents.  Want to be treated like the adult you think you are?  Act like one and move out.  Ask permission to go out and check phones?  I think that's over the top.

    Acting like a teenager?  Find new friends.

  • ?
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    It is common for parents and their adult children to fall back into old patterns when they were being raised as teens.  Unfortunately, with many young adults being forced back into their parents' homes, due to covid and economics, its something we must all work around.

    It should be the case, however, that "my house , my rules" still applies. That means you don't do something that your parents would object to, e.g., drugs, having sex in the house ,bringing around unsavory characters, etc.  It also means that you would or should be expected to contribute to chores, maintenance, cleaning up after yourself, etc.

    So, its  a tradeoff, isn't it.  You get room and board. You would be best off not to get into conflicts and objections about how your parents prefer to handle things, keep to yourself if you want more privacy, and know that this won't last forever. Good luck,  

  • 1 month ago

    They are right...THEIR HOUSE, THEIR RULES.

    There's no "controlling" taking place.  There is no freedoms under control.

    You still have the freedom to move out. 

Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.