Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 1 month ago

This might sound biases but although I have a kid. I don't want to date a man with kids.... Hear me out !?

After an attempt to date a man with kids I have come to the realization I don't want to date to marry one with kids. Yes I hate the fact that I am a single mother and wished things with me and my sons father worked out however things just didn't. We strictly co-parent. If its not about the kids we don't typically converse. Not all parents co parent that way. I've dated a guy with the typical baby mama drama who would keep his kids away from him which meant 50% of the time he was always mentally disengaged from he relationship focused on his kids, also I only have one child. While i love kids technically if i date a man with kids i become a parent to them too. On the flipside I've dated a man with a great relationship with his kids mom ( a little too great) they would text all day, he would always speak of her in the best manner and mention several times he messed things up with her, If he could go back in time he would. He told her everything and was his emergency contact in life, you already become second in a mans life with kids but in his life i came 5th after his kids their mom her other kids by other men then me. So preferably I don't want a guy with kids. Hbu would you date someone with kids ?

Update:

One if the comment below is assuming that I am a woman maybe in my 30's or 40's that is incorrect I am only 24.

Update 2:

Also I only have one child.

5 Answers

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  • Fin
    Lv 4
    1 month ago
    Favorite Answer

    As a single dad, I understand this.  It's usually easier for one person in the relationship to not have kids or potentially have kids who are older and out of the house.  It's challenging enough to find one person to build a relationship with - when they have children, those secondary relationships need to be built for there to be any chance of your primary one working.  That can be a huge obstacle, even a deal breaker.

  • blank
    Lv 6
    1 month ago

    Your life, your choices.  No one else gets to judge (but they will, so just ignore them).

    So long as you are comfortable with your reasons and can handle those comments from those judgy people (like calling you a hypocrite) then you do you. 

    A wise person would never say never and at least keep the possibility open:  for the right guy, with the right kids, without any baby mama drama..... so at least you don't ignore what might be the best love of your life.....

    Otherwise go for it.  Good luck.

  • H
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Now you know why some guys don't want to date single moms.

    I'd have sex with a single mom if she is hot but I sure as hell wouldn't date. Give me thumbs down all you want but I'm giving an honest thought on this.

  • 1 month ago

    I married a man with two sons and have been their stepmother for 33 years and fortunate enough to be the grandmother to their children. Tremendous blessing in my life. Did point out to me that I needed to wrestle with some of my more selfish traits but the blessings far outweigh the drawbacks. For me. However, I never had children of my own and, though I certainly wasn't seeking them, their Dad came as a package deal! It's been a blessing. 

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    Do you still think you are able to date a single man at this age and in top of that you also have kids !

    Girl come on ! You been pop and used and the only option is divorce old man , middle aged man with kids 

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