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PinKy asked in HealthMental Health · 3 months ago

I feel like I am going at a very low stage in my life.?

I used to be an outstanding student like someone who would get the highest in schools and colleges overall. I used to perform martial arts as well and I used to be honoured at that too. I don't know what or why or how has this happened. I had to leave martial arts because of continous hopeless events for about 2 years. And now I am getting C grades in my exams. Even though I think I'm going my best as I can , as I used to do. I don't know where am I lacking. And this is so discouraging, I'm afraid I might get in anxiety or even depression.

I try to keep positive attitude but there is no solution, I get down and keep getting down. My exams from this semester have been worse than I've ever had. I am afraid I might even fail when I haven't failed ever in my life. I have never got lower than an A and now I've been getting C and I am afraid I might get U this time. 

I am afraid I'll loose the urge to hardwork anymore.

I used to love studying. But now I feel like I'm no who I am anymore.

3 Answers

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  • 3 months ago
    Favorite Answer

    Have you spoken to your teachers about this to get some advice? They will have a pretty good idea of why your work is suffering - whether it is actually lack of effort, or whether it's new subject matter or concepts that are harder than you've had before, or whether it's just the disruption and difficulty of trying to study from home during the lockdown. Don't immediately assume it's because of some sort of mental illness - there are plenty of more normal reasons why you might be struggling.

    One thing that strikes me is that your comments perhaps reveal something about your motives. You felt motivated to study when you were doing well, but fear you are loosing the motivation now you are doing badly, which suggests that maybe your motivation is, in part, wanting the satisfaction of getting good marks and having people think of you as a good student. If so, then that's not a particularly strong or good motivation. Better motivations are love of knowledge for its own sake (eg being curious to know and understand things) and wanting to acquire useful skills and information which will help you later in life. Those sorts of motives are stronger, because they give you an incentive to keep going even when your are struggling. In fact they even give a purpose to the struggle itself, because learning to press on through difficulty and accept failure are, in themselves, important lessons which will serve you well throughout life.

  • 3 months ago

    I can tell you about simple behavior modification methods that help with motivation problems but PLEASE do not think that these are a substitute for getting professional help. It really seems that you're suffering from a case of depression, and/or anxiety. 

    First motivation, then getting help.

    This is useful for all kinds of things you don't feel like doing. If a task seems like it's too big, think of it as a series of tasks that you can take on one at a time, and start with something really, really easy. Cleaning - start by cleaning for 3 or 4 min and take a 5 min break. Or start by just cleaning the kitchen counters. Immediate gratification!  

    Homework - start by proofreading a paper or by previewing a chapter you're about to read, looking at headings, sub-headings, etc.

    Short breaks are good but always watch the clock. Look for natural breaks, like after you finish a chapter or write an outline.

    Staying on task - if you find yourself dawdling, wasting time while you're working, here's a simple fix. Decide how much time it will take to get a task done and do it in that time, watching the clock.

    A famous psychiatrist said that when we can't control our feelings we can still control our muscles. If you tell your arms and legs to get you to the bathroom for a shower, they will obey.

    Try this when it seems that you're too tired to work. Lie on the couch, close your eyes, and get ready to work by imagining yourself working for 5 minutes. Again, think in terms of taking it step by step and starting with something really easy.

    When I really am too tired to work, I can sometimes use the couch method to come up with a good idea that I can jot down and work on later.

    GETTING HELP

    A school counselor should be able to advise you about getting help. This video I will show you - this has info about getting help, including coping in a moment of crisis. 

    If you're depressed, I can't tell you exactly what you need. There's no one size fits all solution. I can tell you though that there are healthy lifestyle choices that can enhance the effects of the standard treatments with office visits. This has details about self-help based on cognitive-behavioral therapy and lifestyle choices that help with depression - nutrition, basic lifestyle things like sleep, exercise, and social support, also traditional Asian methods.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wqEM_jlDRZI 

    Treatment usually begins by seeing the GP, who can give you a referral. I mention referral because just a bottle of pills is not a very good approach.

    The things you'd want to tell the doctor are how you feel at different times of day, any symptoms you might have such as change in appetite or sleep, and things in your life affecting how you feel.

  • Anonymous
    3 months ago

    Yet more pity me crap from a loser that can't even figure out how to ask a real question.

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