Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 1 month ago

Why do people associate false negative traits to their ex boyfriends/ex girlfriends?

For example, if a couple breaks up, the girl might manufacture some made up personality defect that her ex boyfriend had that she can continue to "spite him" about. Like if he yelled at her one time because they got in a small fight, she will blow up that fight and act like her ex boyfriend was the most abusive person in the entire world and that he deserved to not be with her anymore. Even though he was not even close to at all abusive and she initially fell in love with him for the complete exact OPPOSITE reason, because he was very laid back and nice and treated her well and was romantic. Yet she will blow up small issues into massive manufactured traits and associate her ex with those false made up traits


Another example is if a woman makes up the fact that her ex boyfriend raped her because he broke up with her and she remembers that one time they had "rough" sex, and she will pretend he raped her even when he didn't, and tells all her friends that her ex boyfriend was an abusive rapist

1 Answer

  • 1 month ago

    It's to make themselves feel better and to come out looking like the good guy or better person. Guys often gravitate towards the excuse that their ex was crazy, when in reality she wasn't nearly as bad as he makes her out to be. Nobody wants to seem like they're the ones in the wrong with stuff like this, so they exaggerate. 

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