Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 1 month ago

Bf wants to record during sex? ?

When we have sex my bf asks me if he can record me, or if he can take a picture of my face while giving him a bj. This really turns me off and makes me feel like **** like if I am a slut. I tell him no all the time but he really wants to take a video. Also when I wear something sexy for him he wants to take a picture but he does not want to come out. He is like just you because you are beautiful. I am afraid he will sell my pics or share them with his friends. I mean why would he want ro record me or take pics? 

Is this normal? 

Thank you! 

16 Answers

  • 1 month ago
    Favorite Answer

    Once created, those images are around pretty much forever and unlike the old film based photos are easily and instantly shareable.

    The trouble with guys like yours is that you’re right: some DO actively share the images either whilst still seeing you of once you break up. Some even do it with multiple women and actively promote the content to make money.

    The other problem with guys like yours who keep asking despite already knowing you don’t want any photos or videos to be taken is that they tend not to take “NO” for an answer. Those types tend to set up hidden cameras instead.

    He knows your views, he clearly doesn’t respect you, and by your own admission his demands make you feel like “a slut”. 

    Have a really good search of his stuff to check for any secret photos. 

    If you find some, report him to police. They can seize his electronics and are able to see if those images have been shared.

    If you find none then just ditch him anyway for the reasons already given: you cannot trust this creep. Record your phone calls in case he makes threats (possibly empty ones) to share intimate images to embarrass you. Absolutely call his bluff on that because if he DOES have images he’s going to share them at some point anyway and this way you take control. But make certain that he fully understands that you WILL report him to police (and perhaps his employer) if he makes any threats. 

    Even if you don’t get police involved, you can retaliate: if he sends messages threatening you, share them to people who know him, including work colleagues.

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago


    Since you said no multiple times and he still insists, that is a RED FLAG showing that he does not respect you. You said "NO". When someone ignores the word "NO", then they are trying to control and maniputate you.

    Reading between the last lines, I get the feeling you did allow a camera in the bedroom. I hope I am dead wrong.

    Again, he does NOT respect you or he would have never made the request over and over again. He is attempting to wear you down. He is. It is totally irrelevant what he plans to do with your sex photos/recordings and he will LIE if asked.

    For a moment, I would like you to think objectively about your relationship with this guy. Does he try to control other things you do? Has he tried to alienate/separate you from your friends or family or things youdid before you met him? Is he jealous or does he talk down to you or criticize you or your choices, your family, friends or your job? If you answer honestly, and there are yeses to these are in a toxic relationship.

    You deserve RESPECT.

  • 1 month ago

    once, me and my women recorded it, watched it and deleted it, together. nothing left to doubt. 

    if he is asking and you have not been together for years, and i mean years, not months or less then more than multiple years, he is going to burn you with that video. when my women and i decided to do this we went over the details like a contract lawyer. i wanted these details so she wouldnt have anything to be suspicious about and she for the same reasons. it was my phone and she did the deleting immediately after the recording and watching of it. anything else and you are a fool to trust to that level. why? how many amature videos are on porn hub for viewing? millions. yes, that many. lots of women didnt know they were going to be posted, lots of guys also. some post together, thats a given. but to those who only ever thought it was going to be private between the two of them and now its on porn hub [of which owns all other porn sites, all, none left out, all] the whole world is now watching those unsuspecting overly trusting fools perform sexually for them. and for free.  if you are going to let yourself get recorded and posted, at the very least you should get your fair share. otherwise you are being used and abused and losed.

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    I wouldn't, learning from a person no one likes on the radio, they use that against you later. So don't do it. 

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  • 1 month ago

    A hard NO. What happens if you dump? That footage could be used as "revenge porn". Bad move

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    A few years ago my husband and me were at hotel for Christmas; anyway I'm dressed like a hooker, well not quite but crotchless tights no bra and tight fuzzy sweater and a kilt, you get the picture, my husbands lust. Anyway my husbands has always had cuckold desires which I have never encouraged, so he gets me sufficiently drunk that I don't even remember him inviting a three guys back to our room. Long story short he gets what he always wanted.

    Last Christmas I have one of my close friends over for drink one night when my husbands away. Drink loosened my tongue and I told her about my gangbang, a look came over her face and immediately thought you know. At first I thought my husband has told her husband, no, she saw me on a porn site, in fact several sites. I confronted my husband and he denied it but it's me with these three guys, so he had to be the one to have recorded it. One site it has almost 2 millions hits.

    I'm not divorcing him as we now have twin girls but to say the atmosphere is strained is putting it mildly. He got his first kick out of witnessing me that night, the way I was dressed and these men basically just using me. It makes me sick to look at the expression on my own face as I appear to be enjoying it and I probably was at the time but not now. And now he gets an even bigger kick knowing that millions of guys are fapping away watching me. And that was my husband, if your boyfriend becomes your X boyfriend he'll blackmail you.

  • 1 month ago

    Yeah, and people in hell want ice water.........

    that kind of stuff is between people who have TRUST. 

    It's fairly normal,  but don't do it causally with any ol' guy. 

    If there's no trust and you think he just wants to show his friends,   then he might do just that. 

    Fact is, even if you trust him and agree........there is still nothing to stop him from breaking that trust,  which is also quite common and "normal" when the break up is bitter. 

    I've done all sorts of things with girlfriends,  always in a friendly , non pressured way, with the clear understanding that  nothing goes further than ME,  and I  am a man of my word, and they knew that. 

    Could I have screwed them over royally?   sure.......but of course I didn't do that. 

    some people do.  That's the risk you take when you play those sorts of games. 

    As I cared for the women and appreciated their own playful nature, and willingness to do these things---I honored that trust. 

    It comes down to personal integrity and whether you think he will keep his word or not. 

  • 1 month ago

    he will post it when you breakup

  • 1 month ago

    It's normal for guys to like videos, but might bite you in the *** later (especially if you're younger then more likely it is for him to want to share with his friends). Just tell him you're not comfortable with the idea of having nude/sexual photos/videos of you anywhere. Tell him you don't want to ruin the magic of your sex by having him being able to use his phone whenever. If he really likes you he won't keep pushing for it. I've dated girls and taken videos with their permission. I've also dated girls I really liked and they said they weren't comfortable with that, so I never asked or attempted to again. If he keeps pushing for that, do yourself a favor and find a new bf...

  • Lili
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Lots of men are turned on by being able to look at videos or pictures of their sexual encounters later. Yes, this is "normal".  Nothing particularly unusual about it.

    The problem is that you cannot be sure what this guy will do with the material.  You don't say how long you've known this man, and it sounds as though you don't yet fully trust him, so if you are uncomfortable letting him video your encounters or take pictures of you, keep saying "No."  Never allow a man to talk you into doing anything you don't want to do.

    If he keeps pushing hard, you may have to decide that this relationship just isn't working for you and tell him goodbye.

    That said, his desire to do this should NOT make you feel like a "slut," and I'm wondering why it does.  A fair number of couples DO enjoy videoing their encounters, taking pictures, and you may be sure the women don't feel like sluts.  If you don't want pictures taken, that's fine, but why should you feel slutty just because he's interested in taking pictures?  

    You shouldn't.

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    Men like taking photos but probably it's better if you don't do it if you don't trust him. 

    Although probably you shouldn't do it anyway, nowadays it's very easy to become viral and once you end up on the Internet, you will stay there forever as people share. 

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