Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 1 month ago

My teenage daughter is out of control ?

I have one teenage daughter and two adult children living at home right now.  I’m allowing my adult children to pay for certain bills and help around the house when needed.  However, I do not have to nag them about it they automatically know what is needed.  Even though they are living with me I allow them to make their own choices outside of the house and I only require them to follow the basic house rules like following a curfew.  My teenage daughter came to my room last night crying because she feels like I treat her differently and she thinks it’s unfair because they are all siblings.  I explained to her countless of times that it is not favoritism, she does not believe me and she keeps begging for a much later curfew.   She’s also starting to become disrespectful I can’t kick her out because she is underage.

Update:

She’s 15 years old @Gypsyfish 

10 Answers

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  • ?
    Lv 7
    1 month ago
    Favorite Answer

    Explain to her, if you haven't already done so, that there are indeed different rules for her, because of her younger age.  She is asserting her desires for independence, for which she isn't yet ready. Fifteen year olds cannot foresee the consequences of their choices or actions as well as older individuals can. Insist that she follow your rules, and also that she treat all others with respect, including you.  If she refuses, well, there are always consequences to impose. Good luck! 

  • 1 month ago

    She’s also starting to become disrespectful I can’t f*ck her out because she is underage.

  • 1 month ago

    This is where her two older siblings step up and remind her that they are adults and she is not.

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    Your adult children pay household bills and have a curfew?  Really?  Where is the father (or where are the fathers) of these children?  Someone posted this same situation last week.  I'll see if I can find how I answered then.  I think I said "your house, your rules."

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  • ?
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    maybe you could reward her for behaving

  • A
    Lv 5
    1 month ago

    I’m not sure why your adult children still have a curfew if they are paying bills. But your 15 year old is not an adult. When she gets older, she will have more freedoms. You should talk to her about what she wants, and if it’s reasonable, give her some extra responsibilities to give her a chance to earn more freedom. If she does all her homework, keeps her room clean, does the dishes, and whatever else you decide on, maybe you can allow her to earn herself an hour later curfew. But no matter what she does, she is still a minor and must follow basic rules. She must understand that until she’s 18, she will not be treated the same as her older siblings. 

  • n2mama
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Curfew? Where is a 15 year old going during a global pandemic that curfew would be an issue? Nothing you have said here sounds like she is out of control or warrants kicking her out. She’s being a teenager. Given that you supposedly have two adult children, you’ve dealt with teens before. This sounds like a scene from Trollville

  • ?
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    She see's the older ones with more freedoms and like pretty much all teens, believe she is mature enough to handle it. She is not, pretty simple.

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    Tell her you'll give her a later curfew, as long as she is consistently respectful and helps out with household chores, showing responsibility

    Source(s): 16, been there, done that.
  • 1 month ago

    How old is she? There's a big difference between 13 and 17! Most kids do understand that they get more freedom- and more responsibility- as they get older. Why don't you sit down and discuss with her what she wants, and write down an age when you think she'll be old enough for it, or how she can show you she's responsible? You might also call some of the parents of her friends and see what curfew they are giving their kids. Usually kids are more upset if their friends can stay out later than they are about their older siblings. 

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