My daughter got into Duke and we can’t afford it, what should we do?

My daughter got accepted to duke university and we really can’t afford to send her there, she is currently undecided and wants to get the “full college experience” of living on campus and then rushing and getting into a high tier sorority  and going to parties and all that.

She doesn’t want to lose out on that full experience at St Cloud State or any of the more nearby in state Minnesota schools that are largely commuter and won’t offer that true college experience.

I told her that we have no 529 plan savings and I will not ruin my retirement by draining retirement funds to pay for Duke. 

I told her that Duke offered her minimal financial aid and that i wouldn’t put myself on the hook by taking out plus loans or co-signing any student loans for her. I also said that working 24/7 for minimum wage wouldn’t even pay for a year at Duke.

I told her if she won Miss Minnesota she might be able to go to Duke. I made this deal as I think it’s something that will be possible but unlikely. She has an old prom dress that she thinks she can wear for the pageant and she used to sing halfway good as her and her friends used to play rock band in middle school so she might be able to win the talent part of the pageant.

The rest is mostly just walking cross the stage to claim the crown and sash and big check.

She applied for scholarships and got minimal and nothing that would afford Duke.

She also is really wanting to get the Miss Minnesota title to help get into a sorority?

6 Answers

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    If you already can't afford to pay the tuition then you're absolutely gonna LOVE paying sorority dues to have friends and maintain a house she probably won't even live in.  

    Source(s): Being in a sorority ain't free.
  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    My daughter got into Duke and we can’t afford it.

    What should we do?

    Time for daughter to grow up and face the realities of life:  not everyone who gets accepted can afford Duke or similar schools and, as nice as the fun stuff is, the primary reason for going to college is to get a degree which will assure you a comfortable life.  Plenty of young people work their way through college, and many others get degrees from state schools and then go on to get degrees from impressive grad schools.

    Forget the beauty contest.  It's a long shot and the fact the she -- not "her" -- played in a middle school rock band would not affect her being selected by a sorority.  

  • 1 month ago

    Your kid needs a reality check. Uni is there to learn a profession, not to win the popularity vote. Just tell her straight up~~ here are your options we can afford, pick the one that you like, and let it go at that. And as far as the Miss Thing pageant, ~ reality check~ that goes nowhere on a resume. Also remember that there are plenty of part time jobs for her to apply to and help out with finances. Thousands of uni and college students work to help support themselves, she can to. Tell her if she wants 'the college experience' she can do it on her dime. If she wants to get a profession she does it on your dime.

  • MS
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    I thought she got into Vanderbilt and that was her dream school? 

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  • 1 month ago

    It's a contract violation to apply to both Duke and Vanderbilt for Early Admissions; both are Binding Early Decision programs, to which, contractually, you may not apply to more than one school (regular decision offers are not out yet). 

    So your daughter doesn't have to worry; having broken the contracts, she's not going to either college!

    If she's smart enough to get into Duke, she'll probably have no problem getting a "full ride" to a state college or university (if not the flagship, then one of the smaller ones), so she can go away to college at little cost to yourself. 

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    I know a Nephrologist who can get you some fast cash...

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