Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFriends · 1 month ago

I'm a single mom and having nervous breakdown what should I do? ?

My kids want friends over constantly and want them to be happy so I give in but there friends drive me crazy n my husband be gone for a year, I sit alone a lot what should I do? 

5 Answers

Relevance
  • Foofa
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Explain to your kids that it's not safe nor recommended right now to have outsiders in your home. Where I live staging this kind of play date would get your power and water shut off. 

  • 1 month ago

    you should talk to me.  listenforyou@protonmail.com

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    I just saw the leave answer DONT DO THAT, leaving the kids alone for a few days is not the option. It doesn’t give us the fear of loosing you, well it does but it also created a divide of mistrust and anger. Personally I’m not an adult but I understand the situation, and I apologize, we can be pretty annoying at times. My suggestion is that you tell your kids that (if they already don’t) they have to ask permission to bring a friend over, not like “hey mom John is coming over at six, is that ok?” That’s more of a statement than permission, they should ask something along the lines of “hey mom can John come over at six today?” 

    If they already do do that than what you do is you just have to say no, you can come up with an excuse or not, doesn’t really matter that may start arguments and riots but honestly, from personal experience and way too many episodes of “Supernanny” kids have more respect for their parents when they can say no and stand by it. It’s gonna be hard but it’ll help you. 

    This analogy isn’t mine but hopefully it helps. Think of your situation like a lion hunt, random I know but it’ll make sense soon. The way lions hunt is they take an old, can’t really run that well, almost toothless lion that’s probably gonna die in the next year, and put him on one side of they prey, then the lionesses huddle up on the opposite side. The old lion lets out the loudest most scary roar he can possibly do, and the prey runs the opposite way because that things scary and nobody likes scary. But sadly the pry runs into the jaws of the awaiting lionesses. 

    The best thing to do in that situation is to run towards the roar, there’s a better chance of survival, you have to run towards the fear, the scary stuff, in order to fix the “problem” Sure it’s scary as hell in the moment but life will be better if you persevere. Just like in parenting, you can’t run away from what scares you, you have to run towards the roar of a hormonal teenager or the roar of your six month old at three o clock in the morning. Or else, this is kinda gruesome but the lionesses of the world are gonna rip you apart. 

    But, right now before you run, or get torn apart, go find your quiet place, it could be your closet, bathroom, bedroom, wherever, make sure the kids are occupied and then, relax, work on your breathing, have a glass of wine maybe. Just do something for yourself, my mom has breakdowns every now and then and I completely understand it when she just needs some quiet time, so will your kids.

    Also you can hire a sitter or send them to a friends house, and do whatever the hell you want. Wanna hang out with the girls? Easy. Wanna just watch Netflix all night and have a glass of wine? Cool, there’s microwave popcorn in the cupboard and that expensive bottle that you bout at Safeway is lookin a little dusty. Wanna let loose and party? Then get your high heels on girl the club is calling your name!

    Hopefully this advice helps, I’m sorry if it doesn’t. 

  • Pearl
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    send them over to play at their friends house

  • How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer.
  • 1 month ago

    Leave. Just flat out leave for 1 to 2 days. Dont answer your phone. Live like you have no cares in the world and get a hotel room and relax. Then answer the kids call and explain you are at your breaking point and it seems they have no love or concern for you, so you figured they'd be better off without you. Depending on how they act, stay gone another day or go back. Sometimes people, kids too, need to see the impact they are having on others and the phrase dont know what you got til its gone needs to sink in

     They need to fear losing you

Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.