- asked in Society & CultureEtiquette · 2 months ago

Am I overreacting for getting irritated at my coworker?

I was in very acute pain today so naturally I was already feeling out of it, and I wanted to double check with a customer that she got her order right and then one of my coworkers yelled about it in front the the guest. He basically threw a hissy fit saying “I did get it right!!” when he didn’t entirely get it right. I responded “Excuse me, I’m asking her opinion because her’s matters the most.” 

Later on today I made a comment (not in front of a customer of course) saying “[insert name aka the coworker] thinks he’s the manager now.” And now my higher up wants me to apologize for “being mean.” While I do think I could have handled it better. I feel like the way he acted earlier was very inappropriate and unprofessional and made us look bad for business. And now she wants me to apologize her for refusing to apologize to him, which feels like manipulation to me. I felt like he deserved it and needed to be put in his rightful place.

Maybe I am in the wrong too, but I want to know how to pretend I’m sorry so I can move past this ridiculousness.


@? We have reasoned with him many times and he has gone as far as to swear at one of the other coworkers in front of the customers. He should have been fired a long time ago. I have told him that constructive criticism has nothing to do with his competence as a worker as we all make mistakes and can use some of it from time to time. If he continues to act like this, then maybe he should find a different job. 

Update 2:

And while I agree that that would have been the best thing to do, when you’re working in a job that requires a quick service you don’t really have time to constantly think about walking around eggshells for one coworker to not have their ego popped, but yes I will take that advice next time something like this happens.

Update 3:

… another thing, to anyone who thought I was sick, I was actually on my period but I didn’t bother to mention that because no one takes women seriously

Update 4:

First of all, I never initiated drama and I suggest you learn how to read. It’s a clear you’re the type who needs their ego stroked and yes.. everyone does this with each other… it’s part of the job. I’m sorry not everything isn’t a 9 to 5 office job. And you would not last a second in my line of work.

Update 5:

And yes this goes towards the “anonymous” person

Update 6:

This is a quick  service business, not a fine-dining restaurant. He should not have made a scene in front of the customer. 

Update 7:

And where did I say he posted anything on social media? You honestly seem kinda crazy to be making these assumptions.

Update 8:

Or maybe you just skimmed over cause you can’t read. Nothing wrong with that either.

Update 9:

I did not complain to anybody. I never complain about any coworkers. He’s digging his own grave himself. Everyone at work can not stand him and over half of them are trying to get him fired.

Update 10:

I literally just said multiple times that it is part of the job description to double-check. You people seriously need to read more.

Update 11:

And no. I’m not going to call out for a whole week every month. I need the money. If you don’t have severe menstrual issues or you’re a man, don’t comment about what I should do during my period. 

9 Answers

  • Anonymous
    3 weeks ago

    Green 666 by isotope rays is NOT forgivable; it leads to permanent hell. 666 is given with World Passport with no name on it (grey plastic card). Police 666 people on highways. Food stores and prisoners/insane asylum folks (released by the antichrist) 666 people too. Reject vaccines. Don't go into UFO to be healed by demons. Hide with Orthodox Christians to escape 666; leave all electronics behind so that antichrist's minions can't track you; burn documents as documents are from Satan.

    Source(s): According to the Last Prophet (aka incarnated ARCHANGEL URIEL aka saint healer VYACHESLAV KRASHENINNIKOV) if the last descendant rejects mark of the beast, then his/her direct ancestors go to permanent heaven. To reject mark of the beast, one needs to hide within a 10-15 people group without electronics/documents. Documents are from Satan; burn them. Electronics can be used to track you and to show the antichrist (even on old broken unplugged TV set from 1970's using Tesla's ether); forgive me.
  • Foofa
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    Unless it's your job to double check your coworker's work you did overstep and probably should apologize. If you're in "very acute pain" you probably shouldn't be at work. 

  • 2 months ago

    Sounds like your co worker did a big cry baby thing with the manager. I wouldn't apologise, but say what happened, and how embarrassed YOU (and the CUSTOMER!!)  were with your co-workers response. If your co worker had a problem, they should have been PROFESSIONAL enough to talk to you away from the customer!

  • 2 months ago

    "I am sorry I said X thinks she is a manager." That you can say.  After all, you are not a mind reader.  

    It is important, at work anyway, not to answer rudeness with rudeness.  The fact that he provoked you, and that you were already in pain, makes it understandable, but still you fell short a little bit. You know with customers you have to be polite even to the rude ones.  Apply it to co-workers too.  And don't take it personally, of course.

    And if I may suggest for this kind of pain, 200mg Vitamin B6. 90% of the people who have taken this advice were very impressed. Better than painkillers. You can take as much as you want, it won't hurt you, but not too much before bed as it might keep you awake.  

  • How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer.
  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    If you don't want to hear the answer, don't ask the question.  Complaining about a co-worker to another co-worker is never a good idea.  Ignore this guy or find a new job.

  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    Anyone on the planet would be offended if someone told them that someone else's opinion matters more than theirs. What he did in response was very petty to post your name on social media followed by a rude comment, but you were the one who initiated his response in the first place. Just something to think about for the future.

    It's not that people don't take women seriously, you don't take yourself seriously, so therefore others give you the same treatment. I highly suspect you project this attitude in the workplace, and therefore try to tower over anyone who makes a minor mistake. Instead of insulting people, try helping them. They'll like you a lot more instead of humiliating them in front of customers. So yes, he had every right to be angry with you.

    If you keep displaying this behavior at work, you will get fired because not even employers want to deal with this drama. If you cause too much unneeded conflict, you'll be out the door. If you realized the other employee made a mistake, why didn't you fix it on your own instead of letting everyone in the restaurant know that ___ employee made XYZ screwup? If you are not the manager, you have no legal right to do this.

  • Craig
    Lv 5
    2 months ago

    You're likely to thumbs-down this response, but you might benefit from this experience if you stop looking at it as simply a "wasn't I justified?" issue.  You clearly understand that it's important to not offend or mistreat a customer - but do you grasp the importance of not offending a coworker?  If you get that, do you understand that your various coworkers might be offended by things that wouldn't offend YOU?  It's true.

    I once worked at a job that required three of us to sit side-by-side to answer guests' questions and make arrangements for them.  Sometimes a guest would ask a co-worker a question that I knew the answer to, but my coworker didn't.  Since the objective was to give the guest the answer they sought, when I saw my coworker fumbling around, I would wait until there was a pause in the exchange, and then suggest that, possibly, the guest would like to know such-and-such, and the answer was so-and-so.  The guest would always be relieved and happy.  But my coworkers were often incensed that I'd presumed to "help" them like that.  Lucky for me, my relationship with them was warm enough that they could pull me aside and express what they were feeling (that I was barging in to their transaction, implying to both the guest and the coworker that the coworker was incompetent).  I learned that I had a reputation among some of my coworkers for being impatient and thinking myself superior to them.

    While it was true that I knew the answers to some questions that my coworkers didn't, it helped me realize that you can't run a customer service organization by stepping on each other's toes in order to deliver perfect service.  It also helped me realize that I didn't really know what sensitive toes my coworkers might have.  If I wanted us to be able to work as a team (which is what your supervisor wants), I would have to train myself to respect boundaries when it came to other workers' attempts to serve, even if they weren't entirely successful or perfect.  I had lost focus on that aspect of being a team member.

    What you might do (if your relationship with this guy allows) is approach him privately and simply tell the truth:  That it wasn't your aim to upset or offend him.  And then ask him to tell you how he felt, in response to your actions.  You might be surprised.  In any event, doing that much will satisfy your supervisor.

  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    You should not be at work if you’re sick.

    Sounds like you’re being bullied..

    Be careful..

  • Pearl
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    i dont think so

Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.