How do single people live fulfilling lives?

I’ve found that once you get into your thirties, it becomes hard to make friends with people since most people in that age group and above get married and have kids. How do single people who don’t get married get around this? And given that we’re not supposed to socialize with people during the pandemic, it makes finding friends even harder 

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago
    Favorite Answer

    If you're trying to euphemistically talk about sex, there are as many unmarried women over thirty as there are unmarried men - so that's not the issue.  The issue is that all of you are fewer and farther between, so you need to find MORE EFFICIENT WAYS to meet each other.  The effect of COVID is to make that generally LESS efficient.  COVID also makes the decision to move from socializing into sexual activity a bit more daunting.

    So:  Two issues - 1) finding/being found more efficiently and, 2) being intimate in the season of COVID.

    1.  Efficiency.  Of course, dating sites are supposedly THE ANSWER to efficient hook-ups if you're beyond the age where nightclubs, etc are useful (or if COVID has closed your preferred venues).  For those who find dating sites to be creepy or disappointing there is the tried-and-true avenue of ACTIVITIES - and this often proves to be what those over 30 should have been relying on all along.  It's true that COVID has reduced the number of options, but it has by no means eliminated them.  Yes, it takes a lot of time to get to know the other participants - but time is all you've got, right?  That's what you were complaining about - too much time alone?  So re-calibrate how much time you're willing to put into making a new friend, and learn to enjoy the trip, not just the destination.

    2.  COVID.  Certainly you should realize by now that hopping into the sack with someone isn't really the be-all and end-all in a relationship, so getting there shouldn't really be your focus.  You've got to figure out how to decide if you want to go to the effort of reaching that place where you each feel comfortable losing the masks.  The key to this, once again, is time.  It takes patience.  You converse WITH masks quite a bit before you're ready to begin the steps toward no-masks.  Then you go someplace outdoors for coffee or a cocktail.  Then after a bit of that maybe indoor dining.  And if that goes well, maybe you can have the awkward discussion about how much exposure each of you has to others who don't need to wear masks around you.  (That's an important step that many people like to just ignore or fudge their way through.)  Maybe once the vaccine thing is all worked out, this won't be an issue anymore, but for now this is the path you have to contemplate.  It's not impossible.  It's not even hard.  It just requires patience.

    Good luck!

  • 1 month ago

    Socialization - taking an interest in the wellfare of other people actually promotes health whereas - social distancing - makes all people less social and more sickly.  Consider children that get no social touching - they die from failure to thrive...  This political plan is against scientific evidence and sound principles

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    they don't... they lead miserable lives. 

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    I am 39 and have been single my entire life. I never wanted to get married. I did not like the idea of being tethered to one home, one neighborhood or one country. The idea of having children never interested me either. I choose to pursue a career that required traveling. I have traveled the world and lived a lot in my 39 years. I have friends that I spend time with (until covid) and they are my tribe. I been lonely on occasion but the single life has been good for me. 

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    And now you know why people break the rules

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