Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 2 months ago

I want him to propose to me. Is that bad?

My bf and I saw a man propose to his gf in the park. My bf said "One day that'll be us". We talked about it a little. He had already been married once before and he said "I'll propose to you much better than I proposed to my ex"

I said "It doesn't have to be anything big, I'm just excited at the prospect of being proposed to"

He smiled and said "Unless you wanna propose to me"

I immediately said I wanted HIM to propose to ME; but I felt bad as soon as I said it.

Ladies, is it bad to want to be proposed to instead of taking the leap yourself and doing the proposing?


I'm not trying to rush him, I'll wait for several years if that's what's in store for us. It would just be nice to be proposed to is all.

Update 2:

Wow! So many answers!

Thank you all for taking the time to answer my question.

A lot of you are saying things like "It doesn't matter who proposes; love is what's important" and I do appreciate that. However, I'm more looking at the way romance and relationships are reflected in society today. 

Is it irresponsible of me to put the pressure of proposing solely on him? I don't want to do it because I want him to propose to me. But am I selfish for wanting that magical moment for myself?

40 Answers

  • 2 months ago
    Favorite Answer

    There’s nothing wrong with females proposing but there’s also nothing wrong with wanting to be proposed to. It’s what you want, how could that be wrong? You have nothing to feel bad for :)

  • 2 months ago

    Lol I’ve never wanted a ring, wedding, engagement notifications, or a honeymoon, just a court house and maybe a week off work and a special dinner with our best friends. That all being said I still would want him to do the proposal in a fun way. And I kind of want it to be a total surprise. It would make it special to me and it would be a good memory that we could look back on and talk about as we get older. 

    That might not be most women’s dream engagement or wedding plans. It might be selfish of me to opt out of a wedding, but it’s still my dream experience. If my fiancé wanted something different then we could talk about it and compromise, but if they don’t care then I would want to go with my plan. There’s nothing wrong with knowing what you want even if it’s different.If his first response was that he would do a good job at proposal to you then he probably already had the idea of him doing that asking. He was probably trying to be considerate and say that if you wanted to ask him he wouldn’t be upset. Probably doesn’t mean he specifically wants you to do it, just that he wants you to get the proposal you want. It’s not irresponsible or selfish of you. Even if it was a little open ended it should like you guys had a good conversation about it. You guys sound cute together. Congratulations on the future possibility of congratulations. 

  • ?
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    No it isn't.

    Some women propose and that works for them, but it isn't for the majority of us.

    I think the comparison he made between you and his ex is a major red flag, however.

  • garry
    Lv 5
    2 months ago

    he wont propose  to you , he just wants your body , wake up .

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  • 2 months ago

    The two of you should be in a relationship thats going to last.The two of you should be ideal for each other.Yes,it would be nice to get a marriage proposal but you have to be in the right relationship to start with.

  • ?
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    No it isn't, him proposing to you should show you he wants to be with you, you already know you want to be with him. Just tell him, don't wait too long, I won't wait forever.

  • 2 months ago

    Maybe you could table this discussion with your BF for a while. You're all caught up in the romance of the proposal. It won't help hurry it along, my dear. In the long run, it doesn't matter who proposes to whom--the important thing isn't the proposal, it's the relationship itself. 

  • 2 months ago

    Absolutely not! its something u want what are you supposed to do? hold it in then blow up on him one day? thats not a good idea. Or if you both want to then maybe you guys could come to a certain agreement that works for both of you. Good luck and hope this helps.

  • 2 months ago

    Lol, of course he should be proposing. It was probably just a joke he made about you doing it. Just be an amazing GF and he will realize he cannot live without you

  • 2 months ago

    Poor guy I hope he doesn't marry you.

  • 2 months ago

    It's not "bad" or "good." If that's what you want, that's what you want. I didn't really have a proposal, we just started talking about marriage, then making plans, then picked out rings together. When we got my engagement ring, he insisted on doing the "down on one knee" thing - we were alone - but by that point he already knew we were getting married. 

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