Anonymous asked in Society & CultureReligion & Spirituality · 2 months ago

if it's not lawful to have sex not being married, why was it lawful according to the bible?

explain why Onan was able to have sex with his deceased brothers wife when it's apparent she wouldn't be his wife ( by law ) nor the child born ( by law ) had he not spilled his seed on the ground, they were not married, if it's law that makes a woman a man's wife and a child a man's child why do some Christians condemn having sex and not being married ( by law ) when by their law or man's law it's not condemned, would they condemn me for doing this today with my deceased brothers wife and not being married to her lawfully? If that happened and she got pregnant and we were not married ( by law ) why would that child be thought of as a bastard child today? also why do some believe fornication means having sex and not being married ( by law ) when no where in the bible does that definition exist, is it possible that all these people running around preaching this are relying on the wisdom of this world ( the dictionary ) for a understanding of this word fornication instead of God's word? when has it ever been forbidden concerning two single person's male and female of marriageable age in love with each other to not have sex with each other? I fully understand marriage is honorable in all or something everyone ( although not everyone ) respects but it's not commanded so why does the bitterness and envy mostly come out of married people and the self righteous towards people that don't get married they believe are having sex. 


someone is not well versed with the scriptures I see, but anyway my point being is no one needs to avoid fornication by being married, fornication from the bible and not from your dictionary and yes, I do think many scholars and so forth are wrong because most of them follow traditions and customs of men and are more persuaded by what others think than actually standing for what the bible says,

Update 2:

 also I am pretty sure you've never cared to view the numbers concerning people that actually do get married that had sex before they got married even with the one they did marry, probably your own parents too, your really missing the point, 

Update 3:

who in their right mind would send their children to hell or two single people in love and not committing whoredom in having sex before they got married which your interpretation of what fornication is, not just this but if you understand the driving force behind sex you would also understand the snare or trap these people are setting up for you that teach you must get married first before you can have sex.

Update 4:

someone, your not reading the question, I said it was lawful in the bible but your not reading into it, Onan knew the child would not be his, WHY? because of LAW, regardless of who's law, Onan's brothers wife would not be his wife, that's the point, had she been his wife the child would have been his, they were NOT married by law, only law permitted him to have sex with his brothers wife NOT being married plus you lack a understanding of that word " marry "

Update 5:

you might need a little help on this one, the children of this world marry and are given in marriage, what do the children of this world do? marriage is obvious, it's what takes place with people that perform a ceremony among witnesses for the purpose of showing others their commitment, at this point it's not a lawful marriage only a ceremonial marriage, this is customs, 

Update 6:

it's not lawful until they register their marriage with the ruling bodies, now what else do the children of this world do, they marry=unite sexually with the possibility of making a child, this is what Onan did, no marriage involved, no ceremony 

Update 7:

these three words in the bible do not mean the same thing, it's just assumed to, " marry " "married" and marriage, Paul gives specific instructions on who can marry ( it's obvious these people are not married ) which has nothing to do with traditional marriages but it's assumed to, it's only to the married that he says this was a commandment from the Lord, let not the wife depart from her husband and let not the husband send her away, still it's assumed a marriage has taken place 

Update 8:

the one's in marriage have this belief, NOW she is mine, the one's that unite sexually ( except the whores, prostitutes, cheaters have the same belief, she's mine, he's mine, law only has it's advantages, mainly to punish the evil doer, it cannot stop divorce, it can only divide up assets, the church cannot stop divorce, it can only influence, the church however can condemn, lawful marriages only pertain to things that effect the law, land, possessions, children etc.

Update 9:

law could care less what God your serving as long as your God don't permit you to break the law, this is something a true Christian should NOT need however as you know or should know, not everyone that calls Him Lord will enter in, many will say to Him on that day, many is not a few, no non Christian would ever make the claim these people make, let alone in His NAME,  

Update 10:

there are MANY that will make it into heaven not even knowing or believing they will, simply because they done the will of God according to His law He writes on their hearts, the power two people feel that allows them to have sex not being married and NOT feeling guilt is called LOVE, this LOVE is what joins them together that God made, not law, this same LOVE is what will cause a child to be conceived, law is not commanded by God to protect this LOVE but smart to all concerned

Update 11:

this is the problem with our youth today, they feel this LOVE which God made yet for many of them it's not possible for them to get married so to speak by customs or law, if and I say IF they hear this gospel of condemnation the results are this, they will turn away from God, the cause of this is WHY? to reject God is the greatest sin, the sin behind this that's not known is the CAUSE, when these same two should be hearing why they need law, law is being used to condemn them

Update 12:

that's not the purpose the law was given, rather than proper teaching, they are getting condemnation, condemnation that's NOT from God but from man, creating confusion in what they KNOW comes from God, societies standards keep raising the age of lawful marriages which only makes it harder for youth to get married by law unless they have rich parents, no doubt to God a work of iniquity being the cause or reason someone sins, the problem here is the innocent before God, 

Update 13:

the one's with the intentions of getting married but either too young or too poor, remember this, God knows the heart, God will NEVER condemn the faithful, it's the unfaithful He hates, the whore, prostitute, the adulterer, the liars and cheats, that applies to everyone, married or unmarried

4 Answers

  • User
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    OK, here's the deal.

    Onan and Tamara were involved in a "Levirate marriage". In fact, they were married according to Mosaic Law. THAT is apparent. (So: you should read more carefully.)

    >> if it's law that makes a woman a man's wife and a child a man's child <<

    Law CAN do that


    law does not NECESSARILY do that.

    >> why do some Christians condemn having sex and not being married ( by law ) when by their law or man's law it's not condemned <<

    You are mistaken. The New Testament is clear in condemning (in very severe terms) and prohibiting ALL sex outside of marriage.


    Conclusion: read the Bible.

  • 2 months ago

    Deuteronomy 25:5 (KJV) “If brothers dwell together, and one of them dies and has no son, the widow of the dead man shall not be married to a stranger outside the family; her husband’s brother shall go in to her, take her as his wife, and perform the duty of a husband’s brother to her."

  • John S
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    Hmmm.. You seem to think that your interpretation is correct vs. ALL the other Christians throughout History.  

    Is there any room for you to consider that you're wrong and the majority of Theologians, Scriptural Scholars, Preachers, Pastors, Priests, even Cultures, throughout history are correct?

    I see people who try to justify various sexual behavior and there 1st step is typically...

    1) It is ONLY wrong if the Bible says it is.

    2) WHERE in the Bible does it literally, and directly, without ANY vagueness, say that XYZ is 100% wrong?

    3) They then Question the verses in the Bible that do reference, even vaguely, the thing that they want to do.

    4) They then find alternate connotations or meanings for the words or phrases, so they can create more than 1 interpretation of the verse and give themselves some 'wiggle room' to find alternate interpretations

    5) They then settle on an alternate interpretation that gives them that wiggle room.

    6) They then wrestle with WHY others don't interpret the verse the same way that they do. They typically conclude that this is for cultural reasons or outdated moral codes OR in order to 'control' people.

    7) They then typically start to prosletyze to others and try to convince people or win arguments (or people) to their way of thinking.


    But notice that this takes waaayy more effort and is waaay less intuitive then the more obvious approach which we use in most OTHER situations.

    A) Realize that the Bible won't list every single action that we should or shouldn't do

    B) Look at the historic interpretations of the passages that do seem to 'relate' to the topic, and take into account what Theologians and Philosophers have taught on the topic.

    C) Use our own understanding of morality and what we've been taught. 

    D) Find the most harmonious way to combine historic interpretations by scholars, theologians, philosophers, and society WITH our own conscience and understanding.

    The 1st approach is more RADICAL and leads to everyone 'shopping' for whatever view they WANT and read that view INTO the text.

    The 2nd approach is more unifying because it looks for consistency and common threads to unite people and society.

    One blends the other tears apart.

  • 2 months ago


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