Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 2 months ago

How can I fall in love my wife after an arrange marriage?

4 Answers

  • 2 months ago

    Hmm... that's a tricky situation you're in.

    If she is a good person and you have  erection when being close to her, maybe you guys can work things out as in Beauty and the Beast.

    But if your situation is much worse than this, consider building a partnership instead where you save your souls and find your way to the light.

    To add to your movie recommendations, I highly-highly suggest Ekaterina: the rise of Catherine The Great on Amazon prime.

    These tv series show in great details the selection process among royals and further relationships dynamics you may find useful. 

    The road to power of  a German princess Sophie Friederike Auguste has not been easy and as many young women of that time she was well-educated,  was taught how to charm, seduce a prince, have family and run a kingdom! Yay, right?

    Unfortunately that didn't work out with Peter the Third. No matter how hard they tried, he had a painful problem with her in the bedroom and it only progressed to a greater problem they couldn't handle. 

    They say relationship is a mirror. 

    So a man either looks into his woman and sees his best qualities reflect back to him, or he looks into the mirror and sees his worst ugly side come out. Essentially that's what happened to Peter. The smallpox disease had eaten his face while her face had become the symbol of Russia. 

    That's how love works. Love can be the best cure or the worst curse ;)

    To conclude. If you have more of a royal case where your marriage was arranged for political/business reasons and on top of that you feel no attraction whatsoever to your lady or nothing moves in your pants, I'm afraid you're doomed to feel your worst beside her. 

    But wait there is more!

    Study the story of Louis XVI and Marie Antoinette or watch the movie literally titled "Marie Antoinette".

    This couple managed their arranged marriage, overcame bedroom blockades, finally started having heirs after 8 painful bedroom years  but unfortunately they weren't very equipped to run a country, so they lost their heads in the process. 

  • 2 months ago

    Dr. Stephanie may well be an expert in many areas but she admits that she knows nothing about being in such a relationship, but then goes on to offer an opinion. All due respect to her, we may benefit from her advice but would feel more confident if she did not stray across the boundaries of her expertise

    My opinion on the matter: Religious people and their families and cohort deliberately give up their autonomy. They become a kind of sheep, blending in. With this difference: disagreeing with the other sheep can get you killed if you are a human sheep. Living in Western Society will only encourage others over time, to want to make autonomous choices.

  • ?
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    Eckhart Tolle is very wise, but much of what he says needs some context and some depth of understanding. 

    These things take time; you do need to learn about relationships. You can email me for a free booklet.

    Good Luck!

  • 2 months ago

    I've wondered about the same thing, how can people become happily married to a complete stranger , selected for them by others. To my western mind, this would be impossible!

    But it is well known, also, that many of these arranged marriages often do work out and that love can develop over time.

    The other side of this , is that arranged marriages are a tradition in which the welfare of the families are often considered, more than the happiness of the couple. And what the parents want is felt to be more important , and wiser. 

    And also, it is often believed that the parents , who know their grown children best, can and do make choices that will be the "right ones" and that will benefit them.

    For myself, I would never, ever consent to an arranged marriage. But then, I do not come from or live within a culture that supports it.

    Arranged or not, love can develop and deepen over the years, if the couple are really suited to one another.

    For an entertaining and enjoyable view of this, watch the movie, "The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel".  While it has many other themes, this wonderful film does deal with "love" vs. duty to one's family, and arranged marriages. Good wishes, 

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