Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFriends · 2 months ago

If a work friend has an opinion of you that is far off base from who u are, as they have only seen u in a work element, let them know?

Work is just that to me. I do my job, please the customers and keep it surface with my coworkers who I've observed to be just not my kind of people. It's not like we applied to be friends and chose one another. 

Meanwhile, work friend professes that he knows me well and that I am like XYZ because I do not tell them my business. 

Yet, what about I have established boundaries and with people I enjoy, they know my business and we have a blast.

In short, my coworkers are not my kind of people. My personal life is great with my people and who we associate with when he go out on the town. Yet, my coworker friend says I'm standoff'ish, don't open up, and that he feels I do not realize how I come across and he has generalized this as the type of person I am, when in reality, I dont feel he knows me either as he's just  a work friend and I dont relate to him intellectually as his interests seem to be Gucci, Balenciaga, cheating on his girlfriends who all feel they are the only one, and I haven't had a thought provoking discussion with him ever as all things lead back to sex with his ladies, brand names, and how much money he just made from a deal. 

Should I correct him on his incorrect assessment of me and explain(somehow)they just arent my cup o'tea and I keep boundaries on purpose there? Just let him keep trying to coach me on how to "fit in" as if I have some social disorder? 

2 Answers

  • ?
    Lv 5
    2 months ago
    Favorite Answer

    No do not correct him. Don't let it bother you. Let him be the one to waste his time and energy trying to figure you out. You just keep being mysterious, keep a good reputation, and be the best you can be at your job. If someone at work said 'you are like XYZ' I would either say 'oh okay' and leave it at that. If they try to dig further you keep your answers vague and simple so that there's nothing they can come back with, and you keep them trapped in this loop of simplicity that will either make them stop or will irritate them. Either way you've won. Make people feel stupid when they try to dissect you, but don't argue with them and defend yourself it will make you look insecure. 

  • ?
    Lv 6
    2 months ago

    Tell him, that he does not know you, and never will, because you do not mix coworkers with your outside and friends life. then ignore him.

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