How do I overcome the fear of confrontation?

I’m 21 and only now starting to realise that I have intense anxiety attacks whenever I’m in the tiniest of confrontations. Yes I’ve always been shy and I do have social anxiety and am currently medicated for it. Why do I always get a intense fear whenever someone makes the tiniest joke about me and I just sit there and crumble. How do I get over the fear of standing up for myself? Even if it’s around somebody I’d easily be able to handle if it ever came to violence? What’s wrong with me. 

7 Answers

  • 2 months ago

    You are a passive person who is shy, timid and lacks confidence. You need to be able to be assertive and have the ability to stand up for yourself by overcoming your inner fears and managing anxiety levels. 

    The only way to get out of your comfort zone is to conquer your fears and learn to confront anyone with courage. Cowardice is fear, Courage is a decision.

    I urge you to take the courage to face up to anyone who makes a joke about you. It would help if you laugh at yourself too. Use some humour to lighten up the situation and people will respect you.  

  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    You should accept that first feeling that floods you and instead of trying to hold it back let it pass and then see what happens.  I learned to drive in a cold country where passing the driving test requires being able to do a controlled skid.  (You don't have to wait foe ice, they have a skid pan to mimic icy conditions.)  You're told what to do but the first time you practice it's terrifying, really terrifying and basically the instructor usually has to take control.  Each time you practice you begin to think clearer sooner.  That feeling of terror never goes away, which is probably a good thing but the ability to let it run through you while you get on with what you have to do becomes ingrained.  To this day when I hit ice I don't have to wait for that moment of panic to subside before I am able to function.  

    It's like this with anxiety.  To this day I feel exactly the same way about criticism - a flash of blind panic followed by automatic internal denial.  I know this is bad, even when it's 100% justified and I should take it onboard - but that driving practice has taught me not to act in haste and evaluate the words.  I think your scale is broken.  It seems to fly from nil to violence.  What happened to a gentle ribbing back if it's a tiny joke?  Do you have friends or even a sibling you could trust to practice banter with, someone you can say, okay, we've done five "jokey insults" back and forth, that's enough, let's go do something else?  It's a kind of diy graded exposure therapy I suspect will work for you like practicing skidding in a skidpan worked for me in learning how to roll with the terror instead of doing the impossible task of holding it back.

  • 2 months ago

    YA So How do I overcome the fear of confrontation? And what the information u put on bottom it’s more like your sensitive your more like a serious person if u don’t like small jokes just say I don’t take any jokes 

    And also mention I’m a thin skinned so people understand that 

    So in this case no need to confront 

    Confront is more like someone insulted u now that’s some serious matter 

    Get the difference 

  • 2 months ago

    ask your doctor to try a different medication.

  • How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer.
  • break through the fear like kicking a door down, its the only way, we all have fears, but courage is what overcomes it.

  • OTTO
    Lv 6
    2 months ago

    You are a sensitive soul who is disturbed by conflict. Avoid aggressive people.

  • donnie
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    I think it is reasonable to not want confrontation but sometimes if you just gotta stand up for what is right then you have to push through it

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