Boyfriend Never Invited Me Out To Family Events ?

We’ve been together 5 going on 6 years next April. Just last week we had a discussion/argument about how he barely invites me out to his family outings ( I’ve only been to 2 and they were super brief gatherings ) he swears his family likes me, it has nothing to do with me, his excuse is “ I barely see my family so when I do I just want it to be us “ which I understand but NOT all of the time. He swears its “ not me “ but it just makes me think he is ashamed of me for some reason. Well... look at today is Halloween and his sister just called him to see if he wanted to go trunk or treating with his neices/nephews. He gets off the phone and starts being weird... he knows I heard him on the phone and I’ll be upset so he starts asking “ Wyd today? “ What are your neices doing today? “ etc. like dude I know you are going to your sisters. I don’t want to start a argument again but WHAT THE HELL we literally just talked about how he would invite me the next time they have something. Its been a few hours since his phone call and now he’s getting ready to go without saying two words to me about going with them just that he’s going to his sisters house.  I don’t get it. The answers always say he’s cheating, their family doesn’t like you or he is ashamed of you or his family. Which I don’t know at this point... maybe he does have a little someone when he visits his family... maybe he is ashamed of me or his family ( which he has no reason to be ) 


Like how the hell are we talking about marriage if you can’t even invite me out to spend time with your family? It makes no sense. 

7 Answers

  • Zyzzyx
    Lv 7
    2 weeks ago

    Given that you are not married, you don't need a divorce to quit him.


  • a
    Lv 4
    4 weeks ago

    I was meeting man-friend's grown children two months into the relationship. I've been invited every time they're in town.

    At five and a half years - no Christmases, no Thanksgiving? It would be different if they lived halfway across the country, but he's close enough to pop over for Halloween (during Covid? Really?)

    By keeping you apart from them, he can minimize what they perceive as your role in his life. If the two of you break up, he can claim it was nothing serious. They can't bug him about the woman he's been living with for six years and where the relationship is going.

    I suspect 'talking about marriage' is an attempt to deflect you from the fact that he doesn't want you and his family to associate and bond with one another, not a serious discussion about spending your lives together. He's throwing you a bone. 

    He's showing you who he is. Time to start believing him.

  • T J
    Lv 6
    4 weeks ago

    Maybe he has another GF, or even a wife.A ex with kids? After all of these years, he should be taking you. Maybe his family does not like you.Maybe the kids are his. Why do you not do the right thing for yourself. When he pulls this, pack your things and leave him. Something is very wrong here. Why have you let this go on for so long? Why have you not followed him to see where he is going and who he is seeing? Do not be used as a fool. Dump him.  Next time he pulls going to his family, call the family home, not him and see if he is there.

  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

    This man is never going to give you the kind of relationship you want. It doesn't matter how long you've been together, he doesn't consider you a part of his family and never will. I'm not sure why you would want to go trick or treating with his nieces and nephews but he doesn't sound particularly committed. You should leave now before your child-bearing window with someone that actually loves you and values family time with you closes. He probably is not cheating. But he doesn't see you as family material. And that's okay because he's not for you. Expect more. 

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  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

    who cares???? i'd be glad. families make me nervous. why are you taking this so personally? break up if you're so upset over this insignificant thing...

    the fact that he's afraid to tell you what he has planned with just his family says a lot... he's afraid of you because you get upset over things. i wouldn't be surprised if you broke up soon. 

    i have a feeling it's not just this that is making him not be around you. you have to be doing something else he doesn't like and he wants to get away. 

    and yeah i'm wondering about the marriage thing too.. almost 6 years with this dude and not even engaged?

    there has to be other reasons....

  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

    He wont marry you.

  • 4 weeks ago

    TOO LONG BUT WHO WAITS 5 YRS? HECK NO...I MARRIED FIRST HUBBY WITHIN 2 months...this one 2 yrs later after we met..

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