Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 1 month ago

My brother abuses and stalks me and our parents won't do anything about it and enable him, what do I do?

My brother is 39 and won't get help for his obsessive behavior issues. Most recently he added me to a site that I did not give him any consent over. It was an Ancestry site. He put me in danger and all of my private information out in the open by putting my name on the family tree on a site called Last year he bullied me and physically hurt me with my Crohn's Disease by grabbing me and choking me. He was mad that I was already using the bathroom at the family beach house and our mother said I could use it. He claims it is his Attention Deficit and OCD but that is not an excuse. Meanwhile our parents enable him by not holding him accountable and making excuses because of his OCD. He says OCD is not his fault but doctors have told me people can fix that whereas what I have is Chronic.


When he physically hurt me last year everyone saw and apologized to me for his actions except our mom and dad. He put everyone in danger with his little game because now it shows my address and full name photos etc. He keeps making excusing and seeing a doctor who hasn’t helped him get over your internet obsession at all or anxieties. I will not forgive him and I don’t give a **** about his medical excuses as this is out of hands. Even our Dad agreed but later made excuses for him. I don’t bully him but I say what everyone doesn’t say to his face. Our mother has even said he is obsessive but she enables it and makes excuses for him. He is a stalker and also strangled me. 


I have a chronic condition that is an illness called Crohn's that has no cure. His OCD and ADHD have cures and there are so many people who have it who go to normal doctors and take the proper medicine and they don’t behave like him. He is 39 and still behaves like your 10. He still refuses to try to grow as a person and refuses to change doctors to get the help he really needs. Our Mom makes the excuse that our Dad is his step-father (his real father didn't want him) but that is no excuse.

Update 2:

So what do I do? Can I get a restraining order for this when everyone in the family makes excuses for him? Do I choke and stalk him so he sees how it feels? I realized I could probably find his real father on the Internet who my brother never knew. He's not really even my brother since he has a different Dad. As noted our Mom will always try to cover for him even when he is annoying as she did that his whole life and it hasn’t helped him any but made him worse. What do I do?

Update 3:

I am 26 and a girl so scared of him now. We live in Wisconsin so the laws are whatever they are there. We don't live together. He lives a few minutes from our parents but I have a life and live about a half an hour away.

2 Answers

  • 1 month ago
    Favorite Answer

    Take it from someone who's been through this very same thing.

    I has the same kind of thing happening to me about twenty years ago and it got to the point that I couldn't take it anymore.

    One weekend while my parents were away I got my elder brother drunk, to the extent  that he passed out and a grenade wouldn't wake him. Anyway while he was passed out I poured sulfuric acid all over his face. I'm pretty sure he got the message after that as he disowned me.

    His loss, my gain.

  • James
    Lv 4
    1 month ago

    If you don't live with him then it should be easy to avoid him. Don't make any contact with him anymore tell your family you won't come to any events if he is there

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