I lack self-esteem and I self-deprecate. Now I'm concerned about how my friends think of me?
I have a close friend. She told me that I work hard but I'm also hard on myself. She also says self-deprecation shows. Although she is a great friend who listens to me and supports me and most of our converation is making jokes or being funny, I'm afraid my personality might seem unattractive or too depressing for my friends incuding her.
I decided that I should exercise every morning because for the past 2 weeks, I have been tired and I can't afford to be lazy.
- Citizen AwesomeLv 61 month agoFavorite Answer
No man who is looking for a friend or love says: I'd like a girl who puts herself down and seems unsure of herself. No woman has ever said: I'm drawn to guys with low self-esteem who remind me of their flaws. No transgender person has said, I really want a friend who isn't happy most of the time whom I have to spend our outing cheering up and reminding them of their positive attributes.
You know this is not conducive to health relationships. Yet, there is a saying what I fear, I create. You fear others thinking negatively of you, so you beat them to it and say it yourself. You fear being unlovable. Yet, the behaviors you participate in will lead people to leave you alone as you bring them down. What I fear I create.
It sounds like you need to speak with a professional. We lean on our friends, but our friends are not trained mental health professionals and it's time you lean on one of those.