Anonymous asked in Pregnancy & ParentingParenting · 1 month ago

Am I a bad mother?

My adult daughter confided to me about wanting plastic surgery and asked that I pick her up after the procedure to which I refused. I am against it since I think she should be proud with what god gave her and can spend her money on more important things. My daughter has since then told me that she feels betrayed but made it clear she will not hold this against me. 

I don't feel bad for not going with her but I want to know if I made the right decision? I am hoping she will change her mind since she has no one else to be there for her. Am I being evil for letting her go alone?

6 Answers

  • LizB
    Lv 7
    4 weeks ago
    Favorite Answer

    It's not your choice whether she gets the surgery or not. You only get one body and one life, so if you're unhappy with some aspect of that, why shouldn't you change it? You don't have to agree with her decision, but refusing to even drive her home afterward seems controlling and petty.

  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

     This surgery is not necessary so it’s her problem zxjqkdf

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  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

    Yes, you're an unsupportive and "bad" mother.

  • edward
    Lv 7
    4 weeks ago

    There are only 2 things she can do.  If you don’t like something about your body you learn to live with it or you change it.  A nurse i know she moved to California and she got lip injections...she looks completely different.  Not for better or worse because she looks like a different person.  She was beautiful before, i don’t know why she had to change.  If your daughter wants to change something there has to be a reason for it

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  • 1 month ago

    You aren't evil and you made the decision that felt right for you, however, just because that was right for you doesn't mean that she's going to spontaneously decide to bend to your will. She's an adult and it sounds like she makes her own money and she gets to make decisions on how she spends that money. I don't think I'd let my personal values stop me from being supportive to my own child, but you also get to say that you aren't available to pick her up. She can call a cab or Uber to get home if she chooses if there's really no one else. So, your decision to not support her isn't so much the issue as your assumption that no one else cares about her except you so she'll do what you want just to keep your love and approval... which is not the behavior I'd want to instill in my own child. 

  • Jill
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    You can be against her having plastic surgery and you can say so but in the end it's not your decision. The fact is she needed you to be there for her and you weren't. Are you a bad mother? I wouldn't go that far but I can see why she is upset with you. 

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