Jack asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 1 month ago

my family gets overexcited during festivals and results in fight, how to fix this?

father is a drunkard+he is the most overexcited guy. during festivals, he is so  overexcited that it looks cringy nd irritating to the fellow person. and he is so stubborn that we were doing a ritual of festival and he came and fought with us because we didn't give attention to him..that way he ruined that year's festival for me. again next year, he found sth similar reason and ruined the festival. and again just last year, he found sth reasons like that and ruined the festival again. i don't even remember all the reasons. he keeps finding new reasons to argue and fight, and most of them are nonsense. what has happened in last 5 years is my mother's brother has came to live near us. although my father helped in finding land and home near our home, he seems to have some problems with them, that after they came here, we have almost 1 fight for silly reason every year, during festival. this yr,i am trying to keep myself away frm him,but he is still forcefully trying to talk with me, i just dnt want to talk wth this person who keeps reducing my self esteem due to his own nonsense. even this year,in non festival season, he was fighting with me for another silly reason. he is uneducated, so can't comprehend much, mother tries to use father in her own way nd fights keeps happening for this reason or that reason and i get into the trouble, how to fix this issue?

Update:

@Kepler22B-: I don't go to festivals,festivals are celebrated in our own home and that is where these behaviours happen.

7 Answers

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  • Pearl
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    dont be around them when theyre having a festival

  • Ann
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Jack, if you live in your parents' home and that is where the festival occurs, then you have no control over that happening.  What you can do, however, is either 1) absent yourself from the celebration by going out of town on those dates, or 2) going into your private space and closing the door (and locking it).  Alcoholics are always looking for some way to escalate a situation.  I had a father-in-law who would always find a way to start a fight during the holiday season, when he seemed to feel it was appropriate to drink more than usual.  He would even bring out a shotgun and shoot holes in the walls of his own house when he got angry enough.  What would be wrong with you celebrating the festival in the home of your mother's brother who lives near you?  They don't have to invite your father if he is such a problem.  Of course, that might present another set of problems between your mother's family and yours, but sometimes you have to do what is best for the general good of everyone. Before the festival begins, tell your mother that you're not going to tolerate your father's abuse of everyone, and especially yourself.  You will have to be the mature person in this situation and protect your well-being.  Good luck to you.

  • 1 month ago

    Alcoholics have the mentality of an alcoholic syndrome.  They are idiots.  Fools. stupid at times, annoying everyone around them.  Family's fight, some more so than others.

    My family didn't burst apart until after mom died,  then all HELL broke out.  I have siblings but I don't have a family to turn to.  Each family is different & can swing way far left or way far right.  Lots of misunderstanding & sometimes out of pure hate.

    Sounds like your dad isn't happy until everything is all messed up & then he will bitc h & moan about how bad things are. We are stuck with family but we can choose our friends that are closer than family.

  • 1 month ago

    Stop going to festivals.

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  • Carmen
    Lv 5
    1 month ago

    You can’t fix something that doesn’t want to be fixed unfortunately only those involved can fix themselves. As far as it depends on you remain peaceable and if needed space yourself from certain events to stay safe sane and keep a calm heart maybe when they see why you not attending as much they may have a change of heart and actions. 

  • T J
    Lv 6
    1 month ago

    Why do you even bother with them at all, forget about your festivals. They are not worth the problems.

  • Dv8s
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Simple, don't argue with him.  Don't say anything, just listen, and when he's finished, walk away.

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