Are these sentences correct correct? It's a response to someone's message.?
Bro, I am surviving in the pandemic like many others, and I hope so are you. Thank you so much for always being concerned about my well-being! I feel blessed to have a well-wisher like you. You are right! It has been a while since we got in touch the last time. I assume you couldn’t make time for your friends considering your super busy life. You are worth appreciating for carrying so many responsibilities at such a young age. It takes immense strength to be a student, spouse and a father simultaneously. I wish you lots of happiness and success!
Does the word " simultaneously." sound natural in the second last sentence?
- CogitoLv 71 month agoFavorite Answer
Hi, it all sounds rather formal and old-fashioned. I'd expect to get a letter like that from a distant, elderly aunt.
I'd have written,
"Bro, I'm surviving the pandemic like many others and hope you are too. Thanks so much for caring about me - it's great to have a friend like you. You're right, it's been a while since we were last in touch. It sounds like you have a very busy life, so it's hardly surprising that you might not have time to keep in contact with all your friends. I hope your family appreciates you, having so many responsibilities at such a young age. It takes immense strength to be a student, spouse and a father all at the same time. I wish you lots of happiness and success!"
That sounds a lot more natural, friendly and not so patronising.
- bluebellbkkLv 71 month ago
You have used the word "simultaneously" quite correctly.
But the message itself is stiff and unnatural.
- GA41Lv 71 month ago
I consider it mostly correct. I would prefer "as I hope you are", in place of, "and I hope so are you". I think "assume you couldn't make time" should be: "assumed you couldn't make time" to bring the verb tenses into agreement. I also think, "I assumed your busy schedule prevented you from connecting with you friends", is less offensive than "you couldn't make time". I think simultaneously is o.k., however, I prefer: " It takes immense strength to simultaneously be a student, spouse and a father....". This is to place the adverb next to the verb it is modifying.