M asked in Pregnancy & ParentingAdolescent · 1 month ago

At what age is it not appropriate to see your child (of opposite gender) undressed?

I have a 13 year old son.  I took him to the doctor earlier this week, and he had to undress to his underwear.  When he was asked to undress, I asked him if he wanted me to step out for this part, and he said "no, stay here".  

I'm asking because my husband was kind of upset that I stayed in the exam room and that it was embarrassing to him.  I didn't see the big deal since our son was ok with me staying in, and it's not like I've never seen him undressed before.

Wondering what others think, or if there's any kind of expert consensus on the subject.


Turned on?  Come on now.  Serious responses only, please

Update 2:

Pearl - He is nervous about going to the doctor, so that makes good sense.

23 Answers

  • 1 month ago

    You extended the courteously of asking and he said it was OK for you to stay, so should not be an issue, it was his choice, lucky him. This however was hugely embarrassing to me as a teenager, I never got the choice. My mom never got around to changing me to a regular doctor from my pediatrician until I was 16, so she was always asked to be present in the exam room. Before puberty it never bothered me for my mom to see me naked, but after going through puberty I became very self conscious about my changes / development and my mom seeing me naked.

    The last part of the exam, I would have to take my underwear off and the doctor would do the penis exam and I still remember how horrifying it was to have to slip off those tighty whities and lay back down on the exam table naked in front of my mom.

    But sounds like your son was more comfortable having you there.

  • -
    Lv 6
    1 month ago

    You asked him and he said yes.

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    You handled it perfectly by asking your son . . . at 13 or 30.

    And someday, the tables may be turned:  when I was an adult my Mom became disabled and I often have to help in situations neither of us enjoyed . . . Mom was embarrassed FOR ME and I told her that she had taken care of me and now it was turn to help her - it's called FAMILY.  Pass that on to your husband.

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    i think it no problem when a parent being at the doctor office or in same exam room with sons. i dont see anything wrong about that. maybe its embrassing if your husband and your son being in exam room that will be very odd. but i think your husband being selfish because either your son had told and allowing you as his mom being in the exam room with him to just do some check up to see his alright that all. your husband shouldnt worried too much about it. i bet he was like that when he was little and younger boy had his parents stayed in the same room when he was same age as his son . 

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  • L
    Lv 5
    1 month ago

    YOU did the right thing...........your husband is an idiot.  If you son would have wanted you to leave, then you would have left and since he didn't - NO PROBLEM.

  • 1 month ago

    As your son was nervous about undressing in front of strangers, staying in the room was appropriate. You acted wisely.

  • edward
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Going to see a doctor is scary for a lot of people.  I’ve done exams on a lot of people, from 5 days old to 17 years old (i am a peds nurse) and the older the kids are they want the parents out of the room more for that part of an exam if they needed it.0

  • 1 month ago

    Families are all different, for some families (like the one your husband grew up in) bodies are very taboo and shameful. For others, there's more comfort around bodies... hell, in some societies people are basically naked on a regular basis. You respected you son, you asked him if he wanted you to leave, he asked you to stay... I think you handled it just right. 

  • 1 month ago

    i dont think anything is wrong with that, he just wanted you there to talk to his doctor

  • Embery
    Lv 4
    1 month ago

    Are they hot? I guess as long as they aren't hot and you don't get a little turned on it's ok.

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