John asked in HealthMental Health · 1 month ago

How can I make it work with my BPD girlfriend I love her we got back together?

She also has bipolar with broke up back in January we were together 3 month and we started talking again I went to her house I asked her if she ever loved me and told her why I didn't tell her who I truly felt she told me she still loved me we got back together I told her I'm not after sex and she didn't have to do anything till she is ready she said I could sleep on the couch then changed her mind we slept in the same bed I stayed a few nights I am in hospital she said I should vist her soon when I get out my dad is the only visitor covid19

When we first were together I did everything to make her feel special and loved but she told me when because I was too nice she backed off and then I was a little bit angry I let her know I made her feel guilty I know not to play the blame game 

I mailed her letting her know if she needs space then it's fine I will let her come to me I let her know today I'm not going to get upset I know she is trying and has took some big steps and I will give her all the time she needs she has been through alot her dad died a few month ago and he hit her raped her and mental abused her too she said he was not a monster all the time and he was not bad to her all the time she self harms too like scars on her arms belly but I don't care about the scars I love her scars don't turn me off and don't tell me to walk away I'm the guy that always learns the hard way I just need to not worry or think about her all the time just she is sensitive very 

2 Answers

  • LAN
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Are you really such a loser and incapable of attracting a woman that you are willing to settle for one that can't possibly meet your own needs?   Sounds like she isn't the only one with a mental problem.

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    People with Borderline Personality Disorder experience difficultly in mentalizing and cognitive empathy, they are more sensitive to negative emotions and often lack cognitive empathy, yet emotional empathy is preserved, or even superior emotional empathy. This means people with BPD are unable to identify the emotions of other people and also themselves. People with BPD unknowingly read people’s emotional state upside down and backwards. Some studies have shown a higher sensitivity to other people's emotions, but they can often be interpreted negatively by someone with BPD.

    The ability to identify emotions is a key aspect of emotion regulation. Being unable to identify emotions has significant consequences on social interactions and relationships. BPD is considered a disorder of emotion regulation, while the term is not official, some mental health professionals and organizations suggest referring to BPD as emotional dysregulation disorder.

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