Anonymous asked in HealthWomen's Health · 1 month ago

I’m embarrassed about giving birth?

I know this seems like a ridiculous post, but I’m so embarrassed about giving birth. I have dark inner thighs and spots on my inner thighs from ingrown boils I’ve had in the past that ruptured. It looks gross and dirty but I’m so clean!! I shower and wash my body everyday, I’m embarrassed that the doctor and nurses will think it’s gross. I have heard SO much ‘oh in the moment you won't care! All you’re gonna care about is having that baby out! Trust me!’ But at this point, I don't find that comforting at all, I have really bad anxiety and I do really care. I guess it was just one of those things I wanted to express because in real life, this topic of conversation isn't what comes out of your mouth when someone asks how you are and how your pregnancy is going lol. 

4 Answers

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago
    Favorite Answer

    Just so you know, there's poop involved unless your hospital/birthing center does enemas.  When people say that you won't care by that point they really mean that you won't care by that point, not even about the poop.

    Most people out of their teens have darker skin along their inner thighs, or if it doesn't come down that far their crack certainly is darker.  It's just that we don't usually go looking at those parts up close on strangers and for some reason people don't observe themselves that closesly either, and then notice it one day with shock and distress becayse it does look like a stain if you don't know what it is.  You have no idea how often something along the lines of "feeling suicidal due to 'nasty,' dark inner thighs," comes up on this site.  It makes me really angry - not that people feel like that, but because they feel like that because sex ed has let them down by skipping over stuff that happens to most people, including milk-bottle pale ones like me, because we act like puberty is just some fluffy hair and boobs that happen toward the beginning and skip over the changes that come with later sexual maturity.  If this stuff were covered all this unnecessary distress could be avoided.  (Oh, and maybe we shouldn't filter this stuff out of swimsuit shoots.)  You are much more normal than you think, trust me.

  • J
    Lv 6
    1 month ago

    Trust me, nobody is going to care about some dark spots on your thighs. The medical staff is only concerned with delivering the baby. Those spots certainly didn’t stop you from making the baby. I’m pretty sure you won’t care about your thighs when you have your cooch in the air and you’re shîtting yourself while trying to push. You’ll be dealing with labor pains and pushing, I hardly think you’ll even remember your thighs. Once the baby comes, it won’t matter anyway. 

  • :)
    Lv 5
    1 month ago

    I’m a labor and delivery nurse. I honestly have no memories about how any woman’s body looked (unless they were obese; I only remember that because it’s harder to monitor your baby when you have a high BMI). 

    If you want, you can discuss this insecurity/this condition with your labor nurse and OBGYN. That will make them super aware/compassionate about it. But you really don’t even need to do that. They won’t say a word. They MIGHT simply ask, but then once you answer they won’t bring it up again. 

    Nurses have honestly seen it all. You’re going to be okay. Our biggest priority is the safety of you and that baby. We care about you two, and we also have to protect our licenses. We don’t have the time to be distracted by mundane things.

  • 1 month ago

    Schedule an appointment with your dermatologist so they can evaluate your dark inner thighs and spots on my inner thighs from ingrown boils for treatment.  Call your family doctor and have them refer you to a mental health professional.  Show them what you have written here when they ask what brings you in today.  Be sure to highlight the part where you have really bad anxiety so they will know what you want to work on.  Once they finish their evaluation they can work with you to create a treatment plan.

Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.