Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 6 months ago

Should I stop babysitting for my best friends 11 year old daughter?

Ill keep this short. Nicole and I have been best friends since high school. She has to work long shifts and so she entrusts me with the care of her daughter, Lizzy, during certain days of the week.

 I have been a part of Lizzys life since the day she was born. 

The father left during Nicoles pregnancy and hasn't been heard from since.

The problem is that for the past few months Lizzy has been ...making inappropriate advances on me. You can do the guess work. 

She and her friends used to just have a puppy crush on me but now I'm afraid Lizzys crush is morphing into something else entirely.

I spoke with Nicole about it and she told Lizzy to cut it out or I would quit babysitting. I also told Lizzy that to her face and she said, "Im just messing around."

However I am not convinced that Lizzy understands why it is inappropriate to make moves on an adult. 

5 Answers

  • ?
    Lv 7
    6 months ago
    Favorite Answer

    Yeah, been there done that myself, and it's not a good place to be.  You need to stay away from that whole situation.

    My story was extremely similar to yours, so I know how you feel.  You can't hold it against the kid, because kids are expected to act like kids.  They want to do the stuff they see adults doing (even if they just see it on TV), and they're just trying it on without realizing the serious side.  That's usually what kids are doing when they do that, and it's usually innocent in nature.  That doesn't make it any less uncomfortable or inappropriate, though.  And it doesn't make it any less dangerous.

    In my case, which is almost the same as your case, the only option I had was to stop babysitting her alone.  I would bring my girlfriend (now wife), my sister, anyone really, and if I couldn't find a co-sitter I'd refuse to provide the service.  I really loved that little girl, but everyone's safety had to take priority.

  • ?
    Lv 7
    6 months ago

    She may not see the potential dangers, but you can,

    She is 11 so you can determine how far any relationship may go.

    Just keep things in order from your adult perspective.    Libby will almost certainly grow out of it.    And will, then, be grateful for your tolerance 

  • Anonymous
    6 months ago

    Yes, or make preparations for Jail.

  • ?
    Lv 7
    6 months ago

    Turn her down and she’ll eventually stop. It’s the same thing between parent and child. A child’s first crush is the parent. As long as the parent spurn the advances, after a while, the child will know it’s wrong. I guess you’re the closest thing she has to a father so spurn her advances. 

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  • 6 months ago

    Yes, stop. Your instincts are correct. If you want to be in Lizzy's life, do it when others are around.

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