Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 3 months ago

My sister is an abusive narcissist. How do I prevent being emotionally hurt when around an abusive narcissist ?

For example at a family Christmas I walked up to talk to my cousins and she started in on "get away, stop no one wants to talk to you, you are being so annoying". Since my mother is her enabler she asked me to walk away to keep her calm. I foolishly abided by my mother's request. I am enabling my mother therefore like she does my sister. We are all adults so it is not a teenage issue. The sister is really immature as part of her narcissism. My mother also makes excuses for my sister like "she has Crohn's so it isn't really her fault". Obviously Crohn's is not an excuse for abusive narcissism nor is abusive narcissism a symptom of Crohn's. 


So how do I prevent being hurt when around this sister. Thankfully I only have to see her once or twice a year. 

3 Answers

  • 3 months ago
    Favorite Answer

    When your sister lashes out at you and makes a scene, your mother will intervene just to shut her up.  And so, this would be the right time to ask out loud...."Why don't we get her to a good psychiatrist so that she doesn't ruin every Christmas for the rest of us?  Am I the only one who is sick of her emotional melt downs, hissy fits and Narcissism?"  Then, I would look around at the others in the room for support because she is obviously a pain in the butt to have to be around.

    I would say to her...."Next Christmas, give us all a present: The phone number of your psychiatrist so that we can all call him or her and make sure you are getting the care you need so the rest of us don't have to put up with you."

    I will assume that your sister is an adult, too.  Therefore your mother has no power to intercede for her anymore.  Your sister must pay for her rude and inappropriate behavior in front of others.....otherwise she will NEVER correct herself.

  • Tj
    Lv 7
    3 months ago

    If you know she is around, just stay away. Cut all ties with her and maybe even mom too.

  • 3 months ago

    i would just see your family some other time and not when shes around

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