Molly asked in HealthMental Health · 4 weeks ago

How can I change?

I feeling like I am failing at life, even though I should be thankful for what I have. I've always been in a out of feeling depressed and alone. I have never gotten help for these feelings. I ruin every friendship or relationship I have ever had. I am mentally ****** up, my ex of four years was physically and mentally abusive. Constantly telling me I am not good enough, or I'll never amount to anything. So many other things were told to me over and over again. He took me away from my family and friends. I have so much anxiety and paranoid. I beat myself up over the smallest mistakes I make. I don't know what to do. I don't know how to be different. I barely have friends because I don't trust anyone. I feel completely pathetic. I'm not sure why I decided to write here but I guess its because no one knows me here. I think I need help but I'm ashamed to admit it.    

2 Answers

  • 4 weeks ago

    I'll tell you about what kinds of help are available. There's basically two kinds of people who practice psychotherapy - the clinical psychologist and the psychiatrist. The psychologist deals with acute problems like major depression and panic disorder. The psychiatrist is a medical doctor who can prescribe medicine. When a psychiatrist does therapy, it's usually therapy that deals with complicated problems that involve the patient's personality. 

    I suggest that you talk with your doctor, who can give you a referral. You'll have to explain exactly what your problem is so the doctor will make a good referral. You could show the doctor what you wrote here.

    Some therapists have begun working on the phone. You can call your doctor and ask about this.

    Legally, a therapist can work over the phone with anybody in the same state. Some insurance companies cover phone therapy. You can use the Psychology Today Find a Therapist feature to get a list of therapists in your state, find out who’s working by phone, and what kinds of problems they specialize in.

  • 4 weeks ago

    See a therapist. When you talk with her, treat her like you don't trust her. Don't tell her stuff you don't want to share. Be guarded, secretive, even a little paranoid. A good therapist knows it can take 6 months or more to build trust, but once you have someone you can trust, you'll be able to throw your ex into the trashbin of your mind and start remembering what a good and decent person you really are.

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