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Sexuality help: What am I?? (Hetero or Demi? Is it something I don’t know?)?

I’m having lots of trouble with this because I keep having issues with flip-flopping between what I think makes sense. I’ll list out the things I know so hopefully it’ll help (I identify as a woman, but I do enjoy coming off as masculine):

1:only have had crushes on men since early childhood 

2:crushes fade fast after talking to them, until the case of my current boyfriend.

3:never felt sexually attracted to any real people (until BF). My Ex BF that came before them made me feel uncomfortable with their sexual texts

4:I made up characters with personality and story that I would pair together, and made some.. hot and heavy.. drawings of them (mostly hetero relationships with some exception)

5:I never look at a guy and thing “dang they’re cute” but I will think about that with girls

6: I don’t like tender touches from most people. I really like touch from BF, but I tend to avoid it most other times or get annoyed with it

7: current BF is the only person I’ve ever been sexual with, and it was after I think 6 months of dating. 

This is all the relevant information I can think of off the top of my head. Does anyone have an idea? It’s really been bugging me because I don’t want to say I’m something I’m not. 


Thank you all for your responses, I really appreciated them and I thought about what you guys said. I think you guys are right and I shouldn’t freak over this and should just be me. I’ve already had talks with my friends in the past with the same questions, so I wasn’t really concerned about that, I guess I fell more along the line of wanting to fit in with seeming to know myself and what I am, when it shouldn’t matter at all since I’m just happy to have what I have

3 Answers

  • ?
    Lv 6
    10 months ago
    Favorite Answer

    You write "I don't want to say I'm something I'm not".  That's what this is all about, really.  It has nothing to do with how you should handle your sexual interests and urges - you've got that all figured out already.

    What you really want is to have something to "confess" to your girlfriends.

    So, think about this:  Why should you being "saying" anything to anybody about this?  Is it because they've all "confessed" something similar to the group, and now it's your turn - and you feel you need to "confess" something yourself, in order to belong, or to get your turn in the spotlight of the group's attention?

    Because there's really NO NEED and no good reason for anyone to tell anyone else about their personal, private thoughts - especially regarding sex, religion, politics, and finances.  Little girls often titter to each other about sex, "coming out" as this one week and as that the next - all because none of them really know the first thing about the subject so it seems taboo and exciting to talk about.

    But as you get older, you'll see that there's nothing taboo about it and when you're actually IN the sexual part of your life, talking about it begins to seem crass and boring (SOME people just won't talk about anything else, and go on and on!).

    So, if you don't want to say something you're not, just don't say anything in the first place.  You already have a boyfriend, with whom you've been having sex.  That's all you need to know.  You don't need a word for it.

    Just drop it.  You say you're "having lots of trouble" and "flip-flopping" and "it's really been bugging" you.  The truth is, you're choosing to do all that to yourself.  Stop planning on how to "confess your sexuality" to people who don't need to know, and all of that will disappear.

  • ?
    Lv 7
    10 months ago

    You sound hetero to me with a low tolerance for intimacy and maybe a low libido. This is all normal.

  • Anonymous
    10 months ago

    You are YOU. Why should you out a label on yourself? Every person is different, we would need 7.5 billion titles to properly label them.

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