Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 1 month ago

Does this mean he will never committ?

My BF of 8 months was the one who brought up the marriage talk for this year but now says maybe next year. He says he is not asking to break up and that we should just enjoy the present together. He says we will see. I don’t get it? He has told his family and friends (who I met before this pandemic) about me and calls me everyday. One of his recent messages is “No future talks and commitment as we discussed before. Stay happy in the present and enjoy”. 

Update:

Thanks seedy history! Does this mean I should give it time?

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  • 1 month ago
    Favorite Answer

    Doesn't mean that at all. Means that someone older and wiser in his circle explained to him that 8 months is nearly two years too soon! That you two, for as close as you feel you might be, are at least a full year away from even knowing each other in as much as you haven't known each other long enough to know how each other reacts to the ramifications of their own choices in this lives and that THAT reality is, when choosing a mate, far, far, far more important than how loving you feel at 8 months. So, I agree. Stop talking about how you are going to build your futures together and get to know each other right where you're at for at least another year. Which is longer than you've been together so far! This is NOT a sign he can't commit. It is MORE a sign that he's a fellow who, when he's actually made is mind up and his heart is following, could be exactly the kind who can. But doesn't want to play pretend at it. So "stay happy in the present and enjoy". 

    Here's a truth; when someone you are dating is pushing for marriage before even a year is out..... it's more about their need for marriage than it is their need for marrying YOU. That's a fact. 

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  • 1 month ago

    It means hes trying to have his cake and eat it too. We like situations where we dont have to commit but still get to deposit sticky things in the anal cavities of the willing 

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  • 1 month ago

    yep most likely

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