Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsWeddings · 2 months ago

Is this a valid excuse not to sleep with his own girlfriend ?

My boyfriend doesn't accept more than kisses because in his opinion, if we break up, no guys is going to marry me and he says I will always think of him because making love with someone is something that it's extremely emotional and bonding. So he refuses it until we get married. I understand he does that for me, because the love he has is not just love, but also care and affection of me as a person. We come from a culture where if the guy finds out you're not a virgin starts complaining and can send you back home. I love him so much,and he loves me too..but his love is more like brotherly love than actual love, as he is not ready to do what western guys can't wait to do with their girlfriends. He also stops me something if we are having too much romantic moments.

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  • Ocimom
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Ask him when he sees you married - is it in the next year or not even close.  Then decide if you really want to be with him.

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  • 1 month ago

    A "valid excuse"? 

    Nobody has to sleep with anybody, no matter what the reason/excuse. It's who he is. 

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  • Raja
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    He firmly believes that physical relations should be after marriage where the couple becomes husband and wife legally .Respect his idea . If he has no idea of getting married actual love may not be possible with him.

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  • 1 month ago

    It’s hard to say. He may mean exactly what he says. Or he may be a homosexual who has not come out even to himself. I wish you luck.

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  • 1 month ago

    From what you've written, your boyfriend has set a high standard for his behavior. There's nothing wrong with that.

    What I'm hearing from you is that, frankly, you are in love with him, and he is not in love with you. He won't have sex with you unless the two or you are married, and there is no mention that he wishes to marry you.

    I think it's time for you to move on.

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  • Trish
    Lv 5
    2 months ago

    It's a valid reason.

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  • 2 months ago

    He doesn’t seem very nice. I wouldn’t marry him. Break up.

    • j1 month agoReport

      I agree with you

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  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    he doesn't want to get married to you. because if he did, he wouldn't say "guys in the future....."

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  • hi
    Lv 5
    2 months ago

    It is well documented (regardless of what liberals say) that women release chemicals when they have sex and this causes them to form an emotional bond with such man. 

    According to Eric Keroack, head of the U.S. Federal Family Planning Program, women who have premarital sex or sex with multiple partners "burn out" the Oxytocin receptors in their brains..

    The result is that they lose the ability to form long lasting relationships with any partners. They also lose the ability to bond emotionally with their children. In short, according to Dr. Keroack, women who have premarital sex, or sex with more than one man, lose the ability to love.

    https://ifstudies.org/blog/counterintuitive-trends...

    Your boyfriend actually cares about you.... I'm also guessing he wants to save his virginity for marriage so it's not just about him respecting you but also about him respecting himself. 

    You want him to behave like a "western guy".... why would you want that?? in the U.S. we have high rates of aborted kids, single motherhood, people with STD etc all these things are the result of premarital sex.

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    • a1 month agoReport

      In addition to thumbs up and thumbs down, we need an eye roll icon.

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  • You're not entitled to sex, or a husband, get over it

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