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Am I Demi/ace/pan/etc IDK?!?

I haven’t used this site before, so please don’t mind me. I’ve been thinking a lot about my sexuality in the last couple months and I still don’t know what I really class as. I’m 16 nearly 17 and I’m up to the age where I’m still confused about my sexuality. I have never been in a relationship before and I have never really had a first kiss before, in fact, I don’t even know if I want a relationship or not, because I think they’re cute and all and I want to possibly experience cute moments like that but at the same time...I don’t think I’m capable or comfortable doing them and it might just be because I’m shy and self conscious and those two don’t really go well together ahaha. 

I have been thinking that maybe I was pansexual for a while as I don’t really care about who I really have a relationship with but at the same time i don’t really wanna get into the sexual stuff really quickly. Could it be that I’m demisexual?? I haven’t really gone in depth about demisexuality before and I’m still in the closet basically. I’m very awkward when someone says that they “like” me and I never know how to respond, like, do I say “ah sorry but I’m demi/pan/ace/etc”. I don’t know.... please help.

3 Answers

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  • reme_1
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Call the gay center and talk to the counselor.

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  • 1 month ago

    So, don't do sex until you decide what really rings your chimes. Spend time with boys, girls, couples whatever and wait for that feeling in your tummy, right below your belly button, that insistently cries for a touch or a kiss from one or more of them. That's your first clue, an urgent need. That's a clue where to concentrate. Odds are you're hetero or homo, but no reason not to explore the outliers.

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  • 1 month ago

    Forget about labels, you don't need one, just be you. The moment you give yourself a label, people will define you by that label and you'll have to live with it. At your age you are exploring and experimenting discovering yourself in the process. You are a sexual being and that is all you need to know. Try things, if you enjoy them, do them again; if you don't, don't. On the other hand you don't actually have to do anything if you don't feel like it, you have plenty of time. 

    If and when you ever do need a label, you will know which applies to you, no-one else can tell you so don't listen to anyone who tries to label you. But you don't need one now. You are 16 for just one year of your life then it's gone never to return. Make the most of it. Soon you will start being 17 and again it is just for one year. Each year is different but if people expect you to conform to their idea of a label you are going to find it restrictive so forget labels. 

    If people ask if you are gay, bisexual, ambisexual, demisexual, heterosexual, pansexual or whatever just say "possibly" or "perhaps" and leave it at that, don't go into details or explanations, it is none of their business. Good luck and have fun!

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