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how do you cope with having a pleasant interaction which reminds you of the happiness in the long ago past?

before i was at the supermarket doing grocery shopping,& when i got to the checkout till, there was this friendly chatty young girl in her early 20's who was talking to me in a friendly way, asking me questions about the food i bought...& she remarked '' i'll have to call around to yours to have some crab sticks ''..i reacted in quiet a shy flustered way.

but that interaction with that girl, reminded me of the happiness in my life a long time ago, when i had flings with girls in around the years 1996/1997...i had sexual flings with girls i met back then through knowing other lads who introduced me....but that was brief because, all in all, i have had a hard life, struggling through life....coping with severe mental health problems, i have been bullied, physically attacked, spent time in prison, been homeless and been through other troubles...& i have never established any relationships and never had a female partner because of it.

i have lived alone in a council flat for 15 years with my only support being my elderly parents ( mum and dad) who live far from me, they have been divorced 26 life is a lonely -isolated one as a live as a shut in, only going out to go to the gym twice a week..

so that interaction with that nice girl before at the supermarket, reminded me of the brief happiness i had and i felt even more sad and lonely, knowing that i'm going back to a lonely flat to be on my own? i sorely miss the female company i once encountered, what can i do?


i'm a man in my early 40's, im aged 42.

2 Answers

  • Foofa
    Lv 7
    1 month ago
    Favorite Answer

    Two of the key aspects of many forms of mental illness are 1) introverted and self-centered thinking...and 2) the inability to read social cues. You were likely the 100th person that clerk had chatted with that day and she probably couldn't pick you out of a police lineup if her life depended on it. This overt friendliness is probably just how she gets through her days at a mind numbing job. You're stuck in the past because you haven't made much progress in your life since then, another hallmark of someone with mental illness. If you're able to go to the shops and the gym then you're capable of leaving your home to join a club, visit a pub, take a class or any of the other things that'll put you in a better place to make friends (and yes, maybe even find a woman willing to date you).

  • MR ed
    Lv 6
    1 month ago


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