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Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 1 month ago

Dating rule. Contact or no contact?

Soo I had known this woman for 3 years. Bumped into her at a gig. We live 4 hours away from each other. We were texting like every minute of every day for 4 weeks. I travel, we go on a date - very affectionate, slept together. 

She was saying stuff all night like your give me butterflies and make my heart skip’ etc 

Next morning she’s in tears saying she’s overwhelmed in a good way but she’s not sure she’s over her ex. Wants to take a step back to friends and in the next breath says taking things slow. Asked her to choose one, she says friends. Still wanted me to stay another night. Saying stuff like she hopes she doesn’t regret this and hopes one day we can do it again. I chose to leave, she was still kissing me as I was leaving. 

Messaged her a few day’s after to see if she was okay as she was crying the last time I saw her. Confirmed with her that she thinks she made the right decision, she says yes she meant everything she said in the lead up to meeting and on the date but woke up the next day wanting to hide away and she’s still trying to work out why, says she is still grieving for what her last relationship could have been even though she can never go back because ex treated her like crap and needs more time to heal herself. 

Haven’t heard from her since other than her liking social media posts and viewing my stories. 

Do I believe her? 

Do I contact her and remain friends or just leave it? 

3 Answers

  • 1 month ago

    Dude, women with baggage like that are screwed in the head. Her self esteem is at an all time low if she can't get over the ex. Dude, she will just keep thinking of him, you don't want that crap, I had a woman like that, ex treated her like a dog but she still made excuses for him, she was just ferked up and it wasn't my job to save her.

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  • 1 month ago

    She's not playing games with you, she is having trouble dealing with her emotions. I think the answer to your question is pretty simple. If you think that this woman is someone you really want in your life then you need to accept the fact that it is going to require you to be patient with her. It will be a big investment of your time. If you aren't willing to do that then look elsewhere. Pressuring her in any way won't accomplish anything other than alienating yourself from her and frustrating you in the process.

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  • 1 month ago

    There is no dating rule. In this case, let it go. If she rethinks it and decides she wants to see you again and give it a try, let HER contact YOU. If she doesn't, you have your answer.

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