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Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 1 month ago


okay hello, so this guy (19) I’ve liked for a long time gave me (18) his number and we’ve been speaking for a while, since we’re both virgins we’ve arranged to have sex - he asked and I was like sure why not. It’s gonna happen at his place this thursday so I ain’t got long to make my mind up. We’ve barely ever spoken in real life though yet quite a bit through text. 

Basically, i’m super ugly and quite chubby lol I’m just super worried that he’s gonna find me too unattractive and it’s gonna be embarrassing. Do I go through with it or not? I think he deserves someone at least a little bit attractive to be his first time Also, I’m not sure that I’m confident enough to do something like that yet, so how do you know whether you’re ready? I’m kinda nervous but I think that’s because I have crippling low self esteem. Thank you :) 

Eden x

2 Answers

  • 1 month ago
    Favorite Answer

    You certainly aren't ready for sex yet. This guy is a stranger. You go on and on about how ugly you are......what about him? What are you going to do if you find HIM unattractive? Suppose he's an old man rather than this handsome young buck you have in your mind. This is a disaster waiting to happen. You know nothing about each other. If you just want to lose your virginity and save all the hassle of will I, won't I - does he, doesn't he......get yourself a male escort. Ok it's going to cost but he'll be far more experienced and you might even have a good time. The money would be worth it. You need to get a bit of counselling to find out why you constantly beat yourself up about your looks and have such cruddy self esteem. I'd work on that for the time being rather than the virginity issue. Tell Mr X that you've changed your mind about sex at the moment and would like to know him better before you get between the sheets. He might actually be relieved if he's as unattractive as you believe that you are. You might actually end up with a very nice friendship without all this pressure building up in the background.

    • Eden1 month agoReport

      We go to college together, hes in my classes so I know him, we just ain’t really spoke. And my confidence issues are due to being bullied for years straight by a group of about 20 boys so it hasnt really been easy.  But thank you so much for your answer, you’re very kind and I will do as you said :)

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  • 1 month ago

    i prefer spontaneous sex over prearranged......being a virgin, im sure he wont care about you being ugly and quite chubby.....i feel that you may be getting the worst part of the deal

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