What should I do about my homophobic mother? ?
mother as bi she has been nothing, but rude to me and has told me that I am going to hell. I don't know what to do it seems she doesn't care that she is hurting my feelings and putting an even bigger strain in our relationship as mother and daughter.
I realized the first bit is a little confusing because it was cut off, but it should say "Ever since I came out to my mother as bi"
- Sasha WhitefurLv 71 month ago
Being LGBT is a congenital condition. (developed before birth) Science is finding more evidence for it, every day. Therefore, it is not a sin, which is an outmoded concept.
- reme_1Lv 71 month ago
How soon can you move out? Give her some space. When she realizes she might lose her daughter she might change her tune. If you are young enough that you are stuck there for a while, could you possibly live with another relative? Talk to your school guidance counselor and the counselor at the gay center. They might be able to help you get into a safer place to live. I wish you well.
- Mincing MeatLv 41 month ago
That's a shame. All I can suggest is to give her time to come to terms with the idea. Perhaps don't talk to her about it very much, and pursue your own life on your terms.
By the way ignore the comments by "Elizabeth" and "Pompous Harris" here - they are homophobes.
- River EuphratesLv 71 month ago
It's confusing because you cut and pasted it from somewhere else, but didn't get the 'Ever since I came out to my' part.
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- ElisabethLv 51 month ago
It is not too much to ask that you straighten out a little.
Make your Mama proud.
- Anonymous1 month ago
If you are under her roof and dependent upon her financially - I’d go back in the closet for now and live to fight another day. Live a double life till you can be on your own. Homophobia is a real thing. Maybe if you are in college you can be out on the down low there but back home keep it under wraps. Definitely involve yourself in some gay youth groups with out her finding out, trevorspace is on online lgbt group that is moderated if none are around you - but really try for in person ones.
If you are on your own and paying your bills- its time to dig in for the long haul. She might cut you off, there might be some holidays spent a part - it could take a few years. But teach her. Always be ready to engage. And just as when you were a kid and threw tantrums and got a time out - you might in turn have to be the adult and give her a time out. Don’t do this alone. You can’t control who you are born to. But as an adult you create your own family. Join some lgbt groups such as a local gay community center, a pro lgbt church or meditation circle, a lgbt charity or rec league. You need to build a circle of support - especially if she does cut you off a while.
But coming out is how lgbt have been changing the world - person by person. By teaching those we know about us we have advanced lgbt rights. You mom has to know that if she is going to be anti lgbt - its against her own flesh and blood.
Oh one more thing - if he homophobia is based on her interpretation of Christianity- be sure and hook up with a pro lgbt church or two. Their are ways to interpret the bible in a pro lgbt way. You could take a seminar on it, read a book on it. And then you’ll be able to easily refute all her arguments - go check out notalllikethat.org.
- Pompous HarrisLv 51 month ago
Listen to your mother Kim, she sounds like a sensible woman who only wants what is best for you. You will need to cease this ridiculous "bi" facade and grow up a bit and start having proper relationships with decent young men.Source(s): Many pompous years