How would you feel if a mutual friend compared your engagement ring to another mutual friend?
My engagement ring may not be the flashiest, but I am in love with the 1.5 C solitaire stone almost as much as the man who gave it to me.
I've recently started to come to terms with that all my female friends do is try to compete with each other and I'm getting pretty tired of hanging around them, even if it means I will be friendless for a time... and I've been friends with a so called bestie for over 15 years but recently all she does is talk down to me, and I don't think I can hold on to the friendship much longer.
She and her fiance have been engaged since last November and are getting married in April (which I haven't even got an invite to although I suspect everyone else got invited and they're just keeping it from me). So when I got engaged two weeks ago they pretended to be excited and mostly asked about the ring instead of how he proposed, how we're doing, or other simple things like that.
Looking back on it now I realized it looked like they were pretending to smile as opposed when my best friend got engaged. They were literally shrieking and jumping. I realize now since I am planning on dropping them that the only opinions who matter are my fiance's and myself, but it still really hurt at the time, I guess.
A mutual/close friend that I have known for a good 7 years now scrunched her face and said "I like Shiela's better. The two tone gold makes it look striking, but all white gold and a single stone makes it look plain."
I responded to her saying: "I didn't know that having an engagement ring suddenly turned me into a runway model. I thought they were a symbol about love." Chances are she told our best friend about it as when I checked my face book she posted on her wall "As you get older in life you realize who matters to you the most" and every one of our friends as well as herself took a group photo at a park near us. I instantly unfriended ALL of them and suspended my account.
I am almost clear of them except for the fact that I work with couple of those girls, but I am just going to simply try and ignore them. Fiance is friends with their boyfriends and he's so angry that he planned on telling them to keep their chicks in line. I told him if he still wants to be friends with their boyfriends then that is okay with me, but that we'll have to learn how to be the better people in this situation. What do you think? Am I being too much of a doormat around these girls?
- FoofaLv 71 month agoFavorite Answer
Chances are you and these frenemies have been at this game for as long as you've known each other. This is just your method of interaction. Right now it's who has the "best" ring. Next it'll be whose wedding is the most expensive. Then in a while you'll be arguing over who looks the nicest while pregnant, who has the best birth plan, who got through delivery without drugs, etc. After that you'll be on to comparing your babies' milestones. You can choose to get bent out of shape over this current ring situation...but you've picked a group of friends to whom all of this is normal. So if you don't like it you probably should let yourself fade from this clique and try to take on a different kind of friend.
- Carolynn MLv 61 month ago
Maybe they are jealous? Who knows? But eventually, we find out who our real friends are. Don't be bitter or upset, just live your life. It's not worth carrying anger and frustration around.
People are stupid. You're learning!!
Congratulations and best wishes.
- historyLv 71 month ago
Wow. So they didn't react to your ring as you wished so you're thinking of ending the friendships because they aren't worth it and you're hurt?
Way too much importance on the ring. Really. Way too much importance on the ring. THEY aren't playing the "keep up with the Jones' game"... that'd be you. Sheila's ring is between her and her fiance. Their reactions don't increase it's worth or value. Don't lose friendships over this. Your ring is between you and your fiance as well. In the hope that a wedding will follow. It is always thus whether other people gush or not.
- BeatriceBattenLv 71 month ago
There’s no need for a gigantic story here. Either be their friends or don’t, nobody gives a shiiiittt, but stop with all the complaining and ridiculous drama.
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- Anonymous1 month ago
"I am in love with the 1.5 C solitaire stone almost as much as the man who gave it to me"
'Cause we are living in a material world
And I am a material girl
You know that we are living in a material world
And I am a material girl