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Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Society & CultureCultures & GroupsSenior Citizens · 2 months ago

What do I do about an elderly person that claims she’s not being fed? ?

This elderly friend of mine, to her surprise, was moved in with her daughter by her daughter while she was in the hospital for a broken hip about 6 months ago. The daughter found out her husband was dying and moved mother in for income. Now, turns out, daughter also gets paid by the state to take care of her mother. Recently my elderly friend has told me that she’s depressed, her blood sugar is out of whack and that her daughter will not cook or go to the store to purchase things she can eat. The daughter has declared- “Since my husband died I DO NOT COOK”. But that’s what the state pays the daughter to do right? My friend has told her son and other daughter, but they won’t handle it. This could be an attempt to get attention or sympathy, but I don’t know and I’m really concerned. What should I do?? 

Update:

I’m close to this family. It’s hard, because I care for them all.. I’m here because I care. 

18 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    As a person becomes older and more frail and unable to do much for themself the relatives and 'friends' soon show their true colours. There will be genuine help on offer and others wishing to give PAID help.  To some it will just be an entrance to the home where possessions can be eyed up and 'valued' whilst to other it will be a place to truly care for a loved on.  Some who could help will not wish to do so and some who are physically unable to do so will want to do so but it will put their own health in jeopardy.  A sick helper will be of no real help at all so, if necessary, paid help must be brought in.  Her old age is the reason that the lady ensured she had savings even though old people love the thought that there'll be something left over for the kids and grandkids.  

    The most important issue is that the old person must receive the care required. If people argue over who gives the care and what will happen to the money then she'd be best spending the lot on professional care i.m.o. 

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  • drip
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    Besides or in addition to contacting Adult Social Services, contact her doctor.   If she is on any kind of medication the doctor’s name will be on the bottle. Tell the office you want to speak to a nurse or the doctor about a care giver neglect of one of their senior patients. They can’t give you any information about the patient , but you can give them pertinent information. 

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  • PAMELA
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    You should contact social services, they have a branch for the elderly.

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  • Ann
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    Call your local Adult Protective Services and have them do a welfare check.  They can tell whether a person is being adequately nourished and whether there are actually other health issues.

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  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    You call social services or the Dept of Aging in her area.

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  • 2 months ago

    Report it to adult protective servicesandthey will investigate. The mother may have some degree of dementia and not remember being fed, or she be being neglected.

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  • y
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    I believe the older fart, unfortunately this happens way to often. The old fart has other kids that apparently, do not give a ****.  Which means, the old fart has no other place to go and is stuck in this abusive situation. Getting the authorities, social services involved may or may not work out for the better. Got a bed, want to take care of her, can you take care of her? It is an option. The kids won't object, just as long as they are still in the will. The daughter might put up a fight becouse of the money, but might just as easily say OK. Not my issue anymore.   Yup, it's a sucky situation all around, wish I could help.

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  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    Contact aged services action or concerted services meals on wheels they will deliver free hot meals and appoint an investigator if there is a problem the will handle it

    • P.L.
      Lv 6
      2 months agoReport

      Are you sure those meals are free? They used to be in U.K. many, many years ago but are not these days, in fact, my mother stopped having the meals on wheels after the charge came in as she felt they were poor value and my brother began buying frozen microwaveable dinners for her in an Iceland shop.

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  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    She's obviously eating something, and there's a lot more to taking care of the elderly than cooking up three course meals. That being said, if you have concerns, report them to Adult Protective Services and they will sort it out.

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  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    if this was a child you would report them to the authorities for abuse. so why have you not reported the daughter for the same thing or are you waiting until your friend dies from lack of care to do something about it

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