How do I tell my boyfriend I’m pregnant and want to keep it?
I’ve been with my boyfriend for 3 years and in the beginning we had talked about whatd we do if my birth control failed and we both agreed on abortion; that being said I think I’ve changed my mind and I don’t know how to tell him. I don’t want him to leave me
He does want children some day, we have talked about it. So don’t go assuming he “doesn’t want kids, period.”
- ?Lv 75 months agoFavorite Answer
If he leaves you over wanting to keep and parent a child the both of you made, he's not someone worth your time to begin with. A man doesn't walk away from his kids, a loser does.
It's hard to predict really what you would do in a situation you're not currently in so it's not really that uncommon to think you would probably have an abortion but when/if pregnancy does happen that you'd change your mind.
Ultimately whether or not you continue the pregnancy is 100% your choice. Your body = your choice. Should you decide to continue the pregnancy and choose to parent then he is required to support financially even if he chooses not to be part of the parenting.
It's also possible he has/will have a different opinion now that the situation actually exists. The realization of a baby is different for men than it is for women. Women it becomes real to them when they find out they're pregnant, for the vast majority of father's it becomes real when the baby is born and they see them for the first time.
- Anonymous5 months ago
I am sorry about what you are going through, but please don't lose the gift of life which many people in the world do not have but you have, do not go with the abortion, you will realize what I am saying today when you see the smile of your little one and when the father sees the baby he will change his mind for sure.
Pls rethink, do not do a LIFELONG REGRET. Giving the baby for ADOPTION is a better idea
- PatriciaLv 75 months ago
Well, if the communication between the two of you is so bad that you can't talk about anything, you're with the wrong person in the first place.
- Anonymous5 months ago
Start by accepting that he will leave you. He doesn't want to be a parent and was up front about it. Now you will be forcing him into parenthood against his will. You don't respect him, and he will resent and possibly hate you for the rest of his life.
Start by figuring out how you'll be supporting yourself. Then just tell him, and make sure he knows how much child support he'll owe. Then watch him walk away and hopefully find happiness with someone else.
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- blankLv 65 months ago
Not going to get preachy about thinking things through befoe hand....
You are certainly entitled to change your mind and have complete control over your body. However - do not expect him to or try to force him to change his mind.
All you can do is tell him - soon (won't be long before it is obvious). Tell him how wonderful it feels and you have changed your mind. Explain to him that you do not expect him to change his and if he does not, that is okay.
Tell him honestly that you did NOT try and trap him... it just happened. Tell him you love him deeply and HOPE he might reconsider. IF not, that is okay - you two will just work out the details of the support he is responsbile to provide.
Then sit back, listen.... and pray.
Good luck - I sincerely hope this works out the way you really want and what is best for all involved. Oh, and congratulations!! Mozel Tov!
- Alan HLv 75 months ago
You have the right to carry your child
He has the obligation to support his child
- R LLv 55 months ago
Something as important as this and you "changed my mind"...well you can expect him to walk away as he already told you he does not want children period and he will feel lied to and trapped. You need to grow up and stop playing games.
- ANDRE LLv 75 months ago
Well, he would have good reason to leave you, as you lied. You gave your word and have decided to break your promise.