Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 1 month ago

I haven’t had sex with him yet. Do i stand a better chance of a relationship?

He wants sex. He knows I want a relationship but he also knows I’m willing to have sex. I won’t have it with him unless he is serious about me. He knows this 

I’m not playing games or trying to manipulate him into anything. I don’t have much experience at all with this and he knows this. So I won’t easily put out unless I’m sure about where this is going 

Do I stand a better chance in getting what I want from him? 

4 Answers

  • Jerry
    Lv 7
    1 month ago
    Favorite Answer

    No matter how a lady may word it when she says something like "I couldn't have sex outside an exclusive relationship" or "There has to be love for there to be sex," this is what most gentlemen will hear: "I only need to say I'll be exclusive, say I love her, and I get my ashes hauled! OH BOY!" That is, they hear "Lie to me and you get a reward."

    Please don't set yourself up for the heartache and disappointment that usually follows this kind of poor communication. Have sex because you want to have sex, not because you expect something in return. Sure, you can get a guy to SAY he'll be exclusive, to SAY he loves you, to SAY he'll be your boyfriend and be good to you. But that is no guarantee he will actually do so. 

    I advise that instead of making sex conditional on "say you love me" or "say you're my boyfriend," you make sex conditional on knowing his character. And knowing someones character takes time. Whether he cares enough about you to simply enjoy your company without sexual rewards or loses interest when he realizes you're not "free and easy" about sex, that will tell you a lot more about him than anything he may SAY for the sake of getting something for himself. 

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  • 1 month ago

    Relationships take time to develop. You can't just start seeing someone and think it's a relationship. This is why we date first - to see if we are compatible and can actually stand to be in the same room together.

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  • sian
    Lv 4
    1 month ago

    Do YOU want sex? It doesn't matter what HE wants and it's only important how he feels about you if you want sex with HIM!

  • 1 month ago

    You have to make sure he cares about you first. If he does he will wait.

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