Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 4 weeks ago

Boyfriends' Mom is toxic & her husband tried to f*ck me....?

My boyfriend & I have been dating for 6 years now.

A few years ago we were paying rent, living in his moms basement.

It was great in the beginning, but after a few months I started getting a lot of signs that his mom is a toxic parent. One example- she would cry on the phone with my boyfriend saying to have fun with his "new mom" and "new family" (she means my family) whenever we were w/ my family. Things like that kept happening but it got worse when I decided I wanted to get a tattoo (my body! not hers!). When she saw it, she flipped out & CRIED. She said she didn't want her son dating someone who looks like they do drugs, etc. She would talk sh*t about me & she would refer to me as his "little girlfriend"

  The more important incident that happened was with my boyfriends' step dad. He came downstairs one day when no-one else was home & kept knocking on our bedroom door. When I opened it, he kept trying to push his way in & he told me he wanted to f*ck me. I physically fought his step-dad. We told his mom & ALL SHE SAID WAS "he was probably drunk" she NEVER APOLOGIZED, never brought it back up, & acted like nothing happened.  

I eventually moved out & 2 years have passed since then.

My boyfriend & his older sister are throwing a b-day party for their mom. My boyfriend & his sister want me there.

My question is: Should I go or should I stick to my decision not to go & have my boyfriend think that I don't care about his family?

8 Answers

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  • Pearl
    Lv 7
    4 weeks ago

    i wouldve told the police about what his stepdad did

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  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

    Ask yourself "would the guest of honor want me there?"   Then act accordingly.

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  • 4 weeks ago

    Fvck your bf and his family get rid of them

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  • Edwena
    Lv 7
    4 weeks ago

    It you and your bf are satisfied with the status quo, then maintain the status quo. If not, then do something different.

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  • 4 weeks ago

    I would go but have a plan. This may sound weird but mentally come up with how you want to react when you see his mom or sister. I also like to mentally think of a version of myself, like how i want to show up. Things like "Positive, supportive, confident, i will stand up for myself." Think of any triggers, "when drama is shown, i will only listen not participate in it". Have an anchor thought "Just one day, i'm doing this for my bf..."

    I do this with my family vacations that I know there will be alcohol around. I do a mental run down how i want to show up and mentally come up with a plan to avoid drinking.

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  • Jerry
    Lv 6
    4 weeks ago

    You have more than enough reasons not to go. Your BF should reach inside his underwear and see if he's still a man! His mother is definitely toxic, to put it mildly, and the step dad is fortunate you didn't have him charged. He's guilty of assault and possibly attempted rape... I hope he's given you more support than you've documented here.

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  • Kyle
    Lv 7
    4 weeks ago

    if his dad tried to rape you, and he'll be there, i wouldn't go.  period.  if your boyfriend can't see what's wrong with that, might be time to find a new partner.  

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  • 4 weeks ago

    I am assuming you've told your boyfriend his step dad tried to rape you? If so what the fook is he doing even ASKING you to go there?

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