Anonymous asked in HealthWomen's Health · 1 month ago

why don't i c um?

im a girl, 16, and whenever i masturbate (basically just touching myself until i stimulate my clit) i never come. idk if i'm doing something wrong or if this happens to other people too. help?

4 Answers

  • 1 month ago

    do you mean not orgasming or not squirting?

    they are two Totally >Separate> things

    "squirting" doesn't always happen- and it is NOT like it is 100% Faked in Porn

    get the facts

    What you're asking about is most typically called female ejaculation (even though not everyone with a vulva identifies as female, nor does everyone who identifies as female have a vulva), and often colloquially called "squirting." 

    Before I say anything else, I want to say these four things first: 

    1) That does not generally happen just "because someone orgasms so much." 

    2) It is not a circus trick: in other words, it is largely involuntary, and not something everyone can do, or do because a partner likes or wants it. 

    3) Not all people ejaculate, and even for those who do, most do not ejaculate all the time, with every incidence of sex, or with any given kind of sex, even when they have several orgasms or have a great orgasm. 

    4) Not all people are comfortable with or enjoy ejaculating, regardless of how their partners feel about it. Something our bodies do a partner thinks is awesome can be something we do not, or do not yet, feel comfortable with. 

    I get the impression that some guys, particularly younger guys, do see female ejaculation as a cool trick: as a sexual novelty. Obviously, we're all likely to experience some level of novelty with sex and partners, and that's okay -- and it's certainly okay to think things bodies can do are cool! -- but I think we also have to watch the line we're walking where novelty crosses the line and becomes or is objectification. Or when we or others are asking things of anyone's body which that particular body may or may not do. Our sexuality should be a reflection of who we are, and what our bodies, uniquely, do, not who or what someone else wants. 

    Too, it often seems like one reason some guys are so into it is that they see it as an aspect of a woman's sexuality that reminds them of their own sexuality. While there's nothing wrong with that, it's also not so realistic, nor does it really leave room for women's sexuality and sexual response to be just what it is, rather than a mimicry of mens sexuality or mens sexual response. If we really want to have great sex with partners, our focus has to be on what their sexuality is authentically and really like, not just the ways it entertains us or reminds us of our own. 

    Ejaculation, no matter what kind of body is doing it, is a term we use to just describe when fluid is ejected from the body in some way. No matter what kind of a body we are talking about per sexual fluids, ejaculation is something that can happen, but doesn't always, and that can happen with, or just before or after orgasm, or can happen without orgasm (just like orgasm can happen without ejaculation).  

    Ejaculation from the penis and from the vulva are a different in some ways, though. The biggest difference is ejaculate from the penis is an integral part of human reproduction, whereas ejaculation from the vulva or vagina has nothing to do with reproduction.  

    Too, while most typically, ejaculation from the penis happens very shortly after orgasm, when it does, ejaculation from the vulva or vagina can happen that way, or well before, after, or without orgasm. 

    Zina says,

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  • Nobody
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Stimulating your clit is what its all about, so keep doing that and you will have all the orgasms you can imagine. You don't have to c.u.m. to have an orgasm.

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  • :)
    Lv 5
    1 month ago

    You can orgasm without ejaculating. Not every girls does ejaculate. Many girls only ejaculate sometimes, but not always.

    People get lost in the outcome of masturbating, when you should be focused on the present moments. Just have fun with it. Let it relieve some stress/tension. Whatever happens, happens.

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    Have you tried different methods?, and sometimes I struggle to orgasm too.

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