Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 1 month ago

I feel guilty about my mother husband no help ?

I’m 34 years old my husband is away on business for an entire month. I ended up injuring my foot on the ice and having to have emergency surgery. Ive now got pins and a plate in my heel, my ligaments cut and reattached and needed a bone graft from my hip stapled to the top bones of my feet. I cannot put ANY weight on my foot for the next 6 weeks I’m basically bed ridden.  I am in excruciating pain. I called my 

husband and he told me there’s nothing he could do and he could not come home from his trip and will be gone for another 3 weeks. When at the hospital my best friend had to watch my 2 kids for 2 nights until my 

mother who is 69 was able to get a flight out here. Not only has she been doing ALL the cooking, cleaning, she’s been taking care of my 2 children getting them ready for school everything. My husbands family who only live 20 min away have done NOTHING to assist us. We asked them to watch the kids Saturday so my mom could get a break and my husbands mother said she had to look at blinds that day.

can’t help but feel extreme guilt that my mom has to do EVERYTHING. Even help me get up to use the restroom. I can tell it’s a lot on her she looks exhausted. I don’t know what to do? My mother says I should demand my husband come home or that he talk to his family about helping a little bit. What do you think? 

10 Answers

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  • RP
    Lv 7
    1 month ago
    Favorite Answer

    You might ask him to discuss providing some assistance with his family. The worst that can happen is he'll say no or, if he's receptive, his family will refuse, but, at the very least, you'll have the satisfaction of knowing an effort was made to get your mom the help she deserves.

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  • 1 month ago

    you should demand your mom come over and help. I hope you are not genetically predisposed to be like her. If so, I feel sorry for your husband

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  • 1 month ago

    I think your husband is not considering your interest at all and should be there for you. As for his family, I don't know what their circumstances are although, under normal circumstances, they should assist you.

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  • 1 month ago

    If Hubby's family won't help out and he is refusing to come home, hire a babysitter so your Mum can get a few hours off on a regular basis.

    By the way is it work or recreation that your husband's trip is for? If business it might be understandable he stays away. But if its a holiday trip he SHOULD be the one home with you and giving your Mother a break.

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  • 1 month ago

    but if your husband is on business trip how can he come home? would u rather he comes home , loses his job or his business and u will be homeless? he could offer to hire u some help thou. someone would come and watch the kids at least a few hours a day

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  • 1 month ago

    Feeling guilty over needing assistance doesn't help anyone. Your mother knows you need help, I'm sure she's glad to be able to do it.

    You can look into a CNA or whatever options you guys have, even someone that goes to help with the kids/clean the house a few days a week at least, if your husband's family won't do anything.

    Now, about your husband, I doubt he doesn't want to help just out of stubborness. Probably he can't drop his job just like that, and that's understandable. Hire someone to help your mom at least some days/hours and relax a bit. This is normal part of life, that's what family is for.

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  • 1 month ago

    What in the world were you doing to injure yourself this badly? Where do you live, I might could help you as I am retired. It sounds like you are out west and that is a long way from me. I'm sure you are right, your mother must be worn out. Just tell your husband that a guy on the internet told you he would help you and since you can't find anyone else, you may have to take him up on his offer. What kind of work does your husband do to be gone for a month? I know something that could get you out of that pain.

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    A mother husband?  You are married to your mother, and that makes her your husband?  What?

    After that - HIRE SOMEONE TO HELP YOU.  What do I think?  I think if you husband wanted to talk to your "husband mother," he would.  If he wanted to talk to his family, he would.

    At least now you know where you stand with his family.

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  • 1 month ago

    u cant work, so u best not demand him to come home, yall gonna need that money..And if they dont wanna watch the kids then i wouldnt feel ok begging them.. as long as momma is there then its ok for her to help u..one day u will likley have to return the favor.

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    What is a mother husband? Never heard of such a thing? Is it ghetto-like baby momma?

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