Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 1 month ago

Would a doctor ask if you're married or seeing someone?

This is separate from the paperwork setup where you check whether you're single, married, or divorced. I'm talking about the very unlikely scenario where you haven't even answered that question, or if you're unmarried but you may be seeing someone. And over time develop feelings for your doctor. Obviously, if the feeling is reciprocated it is professionally unethical for the doctor to vocalize it. The question is, if the doctor is fishing for details, would they ask about your "status" or would that be crossing the line professionally?  I have an acquaintance who seems to think this is totally normal and would not be considered out of line. In my opinion, I would think the doctor would be worried about misconduct complaints after a question like that. If the doctor were fishing, what alternative method would he use?

What do you think?

11 Answers

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  • 4 weeks ago

    None of his business. All he has to do is look at your Medical Form.

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  • 4 weeks ago

    I am a doctor and if I am examining a hot woman, I always figure out a way to examine her breasts and ask her if she is seeing anyone.Usually at the same time so that they know I mean business.  If she is hot and married, I ask her if her marriage is going well or troubled.My hit ratio is pretty good, surprisingly with married women. 

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  • 4 weeks ago

    There is nothing odd whatsoever about a physician asking that question. Instead of sorting through the paperwork, when you are right in front of him, it's not an inappropriate question. Particularly if you are of child bearing years or if you are elderly.

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  • David
    Lv 6
    4 weeks ago

    The doctor has plenty of valid reasons for asking you if you are married or seeing someone. The doctor might even ask more pointed questions like are you sexually active? If so, are you using protection? Some of those questions might seem out-of-line, but it is information that is VITAL to your doctor. A couple of examples...you come in with unexplained stomach pain and your last period was six weeks ago. The doctor asks you if you are in a sexual relationship at the moment. He's wondering (and this is a valid concern) if he should possibly suspect you are pregnant. If you say NO, that might steer him in a different direction. If you say you are having sex frequently, unprotected...now he's more likely to suspect you may be pregnant. Either way, he has to ask so he will know what to check for, as he doesn't want to waste your time, or his.

    The only reason you think his questions might be unprofessional is that (ironically) you yourself are developing feelings, so (in your mind at least) YOU are the one who is not treating the doctor as a professional. Whatever he does or says now is likely to be misinterpreted, as it will fit this fantasy that you have about hooking up with the doctor. But odds are, he's really "not that into you".

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  • 1 month ago

    yes, doctors usually want to know if you have active and a safe sex life

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    doctors will often inquire about your relationship status, especially if you're young, to advise you about using birth control and std risks.

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  • 1 month ago

    It's normal to ask that.. they need to know if you are sexually active.

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  • 1 month ago

    I don't know what the doctor might be worried about. People are attracted to each other.

    Funny thing happened to me - my gynecologist was single when i was a patient. One night i was at a club and he was there... he came up to me and gave me one of his "lines" and said, You're very beautiful, and you look familiar".... I told him i'd be happy to take my pants of and he might recognize my crotch. True story.

    He was good looking, but i was married at the time, so yeah.... that was the end of that

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    I've had doctors ask that to assess your sexural health and risk of STD's to be able to take any appropriate medical recommendations.  I guess it depends on context, but it was discussed with me in a professional manner with no request for any physical exam.  I can't remember the exact wording, but often they use paper questionnaires for such things lately.

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  • LizB
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Standard medical forms will ask if you are single, married, or divorced. The primary reason for that is that a spouse has automatic power of medical attorney, so if there was an emergency and you were unable to consent for your own care, your spouse would be the first person they'd contact (unless you've specified someone else). Knowing that you're divorced is also important, so they'd know that your ex does NOT have power to direct your medical care, nor to have your personal medical or financial information released to them.

    In the scenario you suggest, though, it is HIGHLY HIGHLY HIGHLY unethical for a medical practitioner to instigate or partake in romantic or sexual interactions with a patient. A doctor can ask if you're sexually active, because that information may be medically pertinent. A doctor can also ask you what form of contraceptives they use. If they ask if you're dating anyone just to be chit-chatty then that's probably harmless, but too much inquiry crosses boundaries. If the doctor is outright trying to pick up the patient, the patient should report that doctor for harassment and violation of medical ethics.

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