Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 1 month ago

How do my husband and I stop these reoccurring arguements?

My husband and I keep fighting recently. We wont fight during the day but however its at night time we started to fight. My husband has seizures and he snores really bad (he is getting one of those cpap machines soon ) so he chooses to sleep in the living room leaving me alone in the bedroom. His reasoning is that he doesn't want his snoring to bother me. Well last night I was feeling lonely so I asked him to come in the bedroom. Instead of wanting to be with me in the bedroom he started complaining and repeated things his doctor was telling him to better himself and that I dont care about his health yadda yadda.

He realized he was wrong for yelling at me because i wanted him to be with me but then when he called me during his work break today he started this arguement again and i told him not to repeat himself (he keeps repeating everything his doctor tells him). He is claming i dont care about him or his health and he doesnt want to be near me until his snoring stops. I get it but i miss having him in the bedroom with me. Husband and Wife shouldnt sleep alone. He chooses to sleep in the living room. I told him if he wants to come back in the bedroom then come back or call your doctors, find out when that machine is coming to help with the snoring, go lose weight. But he doesnt seem to go do these things to better himself either.

 I dont know what to say anymore to him because he always takes it the wrong way (like getting mad, throwing his phone, & acting like a 2 yr old)

Update:

How can we stop arguring over this? I love him and care about him and yet he takes everything the wrong way :/

3 Answers

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  • Jerry
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Things might change when he gets his c-pap and starts getting a good night's sleep at night. C-pap machine has saved many marriages. 

    Source(s): I'm a nurse.
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  • Amelia
    Lv 6
    1 month ago

    My husband has sleep apnea as well. We sleep in separate rooms because we both sleep better that way. If anything, it's only improved our relationship because we're both in better moods this way.

    Regardless, if your husband is waiting for a CPAP machine to come in, then it's no wonder he's grouchy. He is way behind where he needs to be on sleep and that can make a person cranky. I think you should be patient with him until he gets the machine. Just let him sleep on the sofa for now. After the machine comes in and he has had a few nights of good sleep, you can discuss how you want to handle the situation. If you have different opinions, you may want to compromise. But now that he's not sleeping, it's not going to be a good time to have these discussions.

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    How to stop arguing: shut up.  If anyone is behaving like a two-year-old, it's you. If he chooses to sleep alone for his health, you shouldn't put your needs before his.

    If the two of you spend time together during the day, you don't need to sleep in the same bed at night; sex can take place anywhere, anytime, it doesn't take place while you're both asleep.

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